Don't Stop Believing

Dec

The 2024 Soundtrack

It’s tiiiiiiime!

A heads up, this is probably my most Parental Advisory, Explicit Lyrics year-end soundtrack ever. You can listen here (or at Apple Music, but I couldn’t get it to embed):

1. Pink (Bad Day) – Lizzo // If you haven’t seen the Barbie movie, this is the short morning song reprise that plays when things start to go wrong for Barbie. Cheerfully singing about how bad everything is is kind of my vibe.

2. I Don’t Want to Be (Live) – T-Pain // A song I’ve always loved, from T-Pain’s On Top of the Covers. Please listen to this live album immediately so we can be jealous together that we were not at the show.

3. It’s Called: Freefall – Rainbow Kitten Surprise // The first of several songs on this list that I first heard on TikTok. It is so good and there are so many interpretations out there of what it means.

4. Golden Slumbers / Carry that Weight – Jennifer Hudson // When my son was in the hospital for three days (a sentence that still upsets me to write), one of the in-house movie channels was showing Sing! on loop. I had never seen it before. This is the attention-grabbing opening song, which happened to be perfect for a parent and child after he is diagnosed with a chronic disease. I can’t listen to it super often because it holds all those emotional memories.

5. II Most Wanted – Beyonce and Miley Cyrus // An early favorite off of Cowboy Carter. I also memorably sang along to it with my sister outside an urgent care in Alabama, as we waited to take my child in for a fever (thankfully not serious). Shotgun riders till the day we die.

6. Mustang – Kings of Leon // A fun song that doesn’t mean anything.

7. Superstar – Rainbow Kitten Surprise // Seriously where has RKS been all my life. A more positive one to balance out the darkness of Freefall.

8. I Can Do It with a Broken Heart – Taylor Swift // From the first listen, the most upbeat song on the album was my only year-end choice from TTPD.

9. Birds of a Feather – Billie Eilish // In my head this is the Christ City Women theme song. This year I was more thankful for my church friends than ever. Best community I’ve ever been a part of.

10. Rough – G Flip // TikTok Song #2. This was specifically written for everyone in the band to show off their drumming ability live. Love it.

11. run away girl – Alice Merton // A banger.

12. Pink Pony Club – Chappell Roan // One day last summer, I purposefully cued up Chappell Roan’s top songs on the way to work to see what all the fuss was about. My initial review was “catchy but extremely sexual.” By the end of the week I knew almost every word of the Midwest Princess album and it continues to bring me joy.

13. Million Dollar Baby – Tommy Richman // I think I actually got this one from Instagram, but anyway, another social media hit that was everywhere once you noticed it.

14. Little Girl Gone – Chinchilla // A girl-power anthem that gives absolutely zero Fs.

15. The Archer – Taylor Swift // Despite being from several eras back, I kept coming back to this one in 2024. Did I mention it wasn’t the best year emotionally?!

16. End of Beginning – Djo // I kept catching just the chorus of this short song (the best part). After going to Chicago this fall I liked it even more.

17. Freedom – Beyonce feat. Kendrick Lamar // This requires no explanation. I will never regret the renewed joy and hope I felt for those three months. What a time.

18. Vertigo – Beach Bunny // I’m not sure how Beach Bunny came to my attention, but they’re practically sonic clones of late 00s – early 10s Paramore, which is one of the highest compliments I can give.

19. That’s So True – Gracie Abrams // The chorus that launched a thousand reels.

20. Sympathy is a knife (remix) – Charli XCX feat. Ariana Grande // C loved Apple and requested it on repeat for a while, but this remix hit me viscerally. Shoutout to my friend Jenny for being my ambassador of brat.

21. White Winter Hymnal – Fleet Foxes // I was driving C to school the morning of November 6, feeling like I had been hit by a bus, and this song was on the radio. The DJ came on and said he was playing calming music to help everyone take care of themselves today. I cried.

22. Sinking Boat – Infinity Song // Thanks to this 70s-throwback group for giving me a mantra for 2025: Why should I worry about rocking a sinking boat? It’s all going down and we’re majoring on the minor notes.

23. Whatchu Kno About Me – GloRilla // I listened to Glorious a lot this fall and legit had a hard time settling on a song for this (please look up the dancing weatherman doing “Hollon” in Times Square), but Bitch I’m from Memphis, whatchu know about me is the new rallying cry for the 901.

24. Good News – Shaboozey // From his guitar to God’s ears.

25. Defying Gravity – Cynthia Erivo feat. Ariana Grande // Timeless.

Past Years: 2023 // 2022 // 2021 // 2020 // 2019 // 2018 // 2017 // 2016 // 2015 // 2014

Add a Comment + Posted in: music, year end

Apr

Not an April Fool

Is anyone still here? There’s no catching up on six months of lost updates, but I currently do not feel overwhelmed at the thought of sharing some things. So hello!

Life Update

My little family and I have been through a lot in the last couple of months. At the beginning of February, my toddler son C was admitted to the hospital with Type 1 Diabetes. In an instant, all of our lives changed almost as drastically as when he was born – and as I told friends, the month of February felt like bringing a new baby home from the hospital all over again. (Not an experience I wanted to revisit!!) The only difference was that we were all sleeping this time. While the diagnosis was a shock, C is happier and more energetic than we’ve ever seen him since starting on insulin. He’s a whole new kid. As rare as it already is for a two-and-a-half year old to present with T1D, I think he probably had it for a while and we just didn’t know. I expect to write more in the future about these events and the experience of being a T1D parent, but in summary, we have all come a LONG way in a short time and C is doing great. He has an excellent team of doctors and we have felt reassured and supported from the first moment. THANKFUL.

The other reason February felt postpartum-y is that a few days after C got out of the hospital, I had surgery. I’ve had a lot of health problems over the last year or so, contributing to almost zero iron in my bloodstream ( = no energy), and last fall I decided to have a hysterectomy. At 44, I officially do not have it in me to go through the pregnancy and birth process again. Also, I was miserable. My doctor fully supported my decision. It was an outpatient robotic laparoscopic procedure, and I had to wait six months for a spot because the robot OR is in high demand. Overall, my recovery has been good, and I’m feeling good now at seven weeks PO. However, the first couple of weeks were crazy because we were also adjusting to having a diabetic kid. It took a while to figure everything out with C’s preschool, so he was home, and we needed a lot of grandparent assistance while I was down for the count. I ended up extending my medical leave by a week to get enough true rest and get my head together. Anyway, I think it’s important to normalize women’s health, and I’m here to discuss with anyone thinking about yeeting their uterus! I’m glad I did it and excited to feel strong again and wear white pants without fear.

We had a big snow in January, before all the madness. Don’t laugh, 5″ is big for Memphis! We have no infrastructure! My mom, who has a white Jeep, got mini white Jeeps for the three youngest grandkids and C loves his. He wasn’t sure about driving it in the snow, though. He was also fairly nonplussed about our snowman, despite being in an Olaf phase. We were essentially snowed in for an entire week. Somehow all three of us survived.

My word for 2024 is Revive. I made this vision board for it in January. The flamingo represents a movement my friend Kelsey told me about called Get Your Pink Back – it’s a reference to how mother flamingos temporarily lose their pink color. Of course, a year meant to be about revival has kicked off with a time of depletion. If I was choosing now, I would choose Acceptance. On my bad days, I feel all knotted up inside trying to figure out how to fix various problems in my life. My nature for the last decade or so has been to fight and overcome. I think what I need currently is to stop fighting and let my life be what it is, and myself be what I am. Not giving up. Just taking a break from thrashing around internally. Anyway, I guess I can have two words – what, are they going to send the One Word police?

Reading

Here are a few things I’ve been reading. HOFAS was a slog. I am 3/5 through the stack on the right. I read the R. Eric Thomas book in two sittings (and repeatedly LOLed at it on a plane). Here is a brief list of everything I’ve read so far in 2024:

On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good by Elise Loehnen (5 stars)
You Got Anything Stronger?: Stories by Gabrielle Union (4 stars)
The Most Likely Club by Elyssa Friedland (4 stars)
It Was an Ugly Couch Anyway: And Other Thoughts on Moving Forward by Elizabeth Passarella (4 stars)
House of Flame and Shadow by Sarah J. Maas (3 stars)
One in a Millennial: On Friendship, Feelings, Fangirls, and Fitting In by Kate Kennedy (4 stars)
Beyond the Wand: The Magic and Mayhem of Growing Up a Wizard by Tom Felton (4 stars)
The Wisdom of Your Body by Dr. Hillary L. McBride (4 stars)
Leslie F*cking Jones by Leslie Jones (4 stars)
Congratulations, the Best is Over! by R. Eric Thomas (5 stars)
This Impossible Brightness by Jessica Bryant Klagmann (3.5 stars)
The Real Deal by Caitlin Devlin (3 stars)

And, of course, a ton of fanfic, without which this list would be longer.

Travel

During C’s spring break, we took a road trip through the Florida Keys and stayed in Key West for a couple of nights. I’ve spent a lot of time in the Keys and it’s one of my favorite places in the world, but I’ve usually been there on the serious family business of catching lobster. (THIS IS NOT A VACATION! WE ARE HERE FOR LOBSTER!) So I was excited to actually experience Key West. It was our first trip since C’s diagnosis, and I’m happy to report it was no more difficult to manage his diabetes on the road than it is at home. He had a great time. It was a lot for both of us, though – the day we got home, C and I both slept all afternoon.

Judy Blume’s bookstore!!! (She was not there.)

The Key West Butterfly & Nature Conservatory must be seen to be believed. There’s a difference between being told about hundreds of butterflies and actually experiencing them. I could have stayed all day and will definitely visit again.

We came back to Miami for our last night to see my uncle and my 91-year-old grandfather. He’s having a tough time, but still hanging in. He was happy to see his great-grandson.

Home

We did a bathroom remodel / primary bathroom creation last fall right before the holidays. (As in, hired a crew to do it.) We closed off an unnecessary loop upstairs to double the size of one small bathroom AND create a new closet, which in Midtown is a big deal. There’s a tall double vanity with drawers and a luxurious walk-in shower, and it has been such a retreat during the recent craziness. It’s also nice to share a bathroom with my husband instead of my toddler. I’ve taken the opportunity to rethink some organization, and this drawer makes me feel like an influencer. These bendy plastic dividers are $2 for a multipack at Target. Highly recommend.

The bathroom remodel was part of a house overhaul that escalated. We also got all-new kitchen appliances last fall because something was wrong with all the old ones. The fridge kept dropping to freezing and destroying all of my produce. The oven randomly didn’t light. The dishwasher randomly failed to dispense detergent. It was no way to live, and because they were all Viking appliances (that came with the house), it was cheaper to get new stuff than to have it fixed! My favorite feature of the new fridge is the craft ice maker. I haven’t used the ice in a cocktail yet, but I love it in freshly brewed iced tea. It’ll be great for mules.

Since the greenhouse is finally sealed, I’ve already started my garden! The soil in the greenhouse was past its prime, so Taylor totally replaced it for me. I have cucumbers, a few peppers, basil, dill, and cilantro. Taylor got me blueberry, strawberry, and raspberry plants. I’m only doing two big tomato plants this year, a Better Boy and a grape tomato, and we also have a hanging grape tomato that already has fruit on it. I may add more things as I come across them, since there’s some free space. We have been waiting to finish and mulch the flower beds until the Great Oaking is complete, which seems to be happening as we speak.

Fashion & Beauty

I recently went to a Cabi party at my neighbor’s house. I didn’t buy anything because the prices were outrageous, but I can’t stop thinking about the concept, which is basically Garanimals for adults. Every season they put out a few collections that are on trend and all the pieces go together. Like many people, I haven’t felt right in my clothes since March 2020. I used to know exactly what I liked and what would look best on me. I had a carefully curated wardrobe that met my needs as a childless woman working in a professional environment whose weight had been stable for a decade. In March 2024, none of those things still apply. In the intervening time I have bought bins and bins of clothes (mostly at thrift so it’s low-risk) that haven’t worked long term. I can’t get my closet door shut, but am not excited to get dressed and usually end up in a meh shirt and the same pair of skinny jeans. I still don’t know how to “flatter” this body that’s 25 pounds heavier than my pre-pandemic, pre-pregnancy one. What the Cabi party made me realize is I don’t know how to put an outfit together anymore, and that is the main cause of my malaise. I need a personal fashion consultant and/or Garanimals for adults. In the meantime I’m doing sort of a default sporty mom thing.

As you can see in some of the sweatshirt pictures, I am occasionally rocking straight hair these days. My curl pattern has loosened noticeably since having C (I went from 3b to 3a, or even 2c in places) and I bought a Revlon One Step to explore my options. I was shocked by how easily my hair blew out. I like the different look, and straighter hair is just easier to deal with sometimes. Also, so far no one has made an excessive deal about it or told me I “LOOK SO MUCH BETTER,” which was a problem in my 20s and made me swear off straightening completely. Let people live!!

I continue to get a monthly Ipsy bag (that’s where I got most of the prods in the bathroom drawer photo). It has turned me from a woman who had no idea how to use liquid eyeliner to one who wants to use ONLY liquid eyeliner. I’ve been thinking of getting a lash lift, but then I was influenced by Elyse Meyers to try this serum instead. Supposedly it takes six weeks to see the full effect. Will report back.

Random Happiness

We went to Boulder, Colorado last Labor Day (a trip I never got around to posting about) and FELL IN LOVE with the place. I left a piece of my heart there and feel happier when I use this mug. We’re hoping to go back this summer.

I say this a lot, but I have never been so happy at a church as I am currently. Going into my surgery and then with C’s unexpected diagnosis, I felt confident that if I really needed support in a specific area, I could ask for it and someone in our church community would step up. That means everything. I also extend this to my friend Sarah, who has the same giving spirit and offered to help in any way we needed. <3

I’ve become a fan of Jo Piazza, who has a Substack and a podcast and several books, including her new novel based on the true story of her ancestor’s murder in Sicily. I got lifetime paid access to her Substack for pre-ordering the book, and am really enjoying her posts. I also became a paid subscriber of Caro Chambers in January. I have yet to dive deep into her recipes because… life, but I have implemented her meal planning idea where you choose a handful of recipes and only make those for a while. I physically printed out 8 recipes, stuck them on the side of the fridge, and try to make sure I keep the ingredients in stock. It’s not rocket science but it helps. Pretty soon I’ll do a refresh for spring.

This Target candle is a solid dupe for the famous Anthropologie candle. You’ll know it when you smell it.

Toddler Update

C will turn three before we know it and is growing exponentially in every way. His vocabulary has exploded and he’s having full conversations. He can count to around 50 and is reading (I also read before three, so this is not unprecedented). Even if it’s simple sight recognition, we have confirmed it with tests like typing words on our phones without context and asking him what it says. His current favorite books are Go, Dog, Go and Tiger & Grizz Play Basketball. He can also do basic addition and subtraction thanks to Numberblocks. He has adjusted to T1D like a champ and no longer cries or objects to his insulin shots (which is kind of sad, but overall positive). He enjoys school and is talking to us more about his friends. We are still dealing with some classic toddler tantrums and fussiness, but overall I’m liking this age.

Mommy and me Easter outfits from Old Navy

Your Monthly Rufus

Rufus will be ten years old next month (!!!), but he’s still a healthy and fairly energetic kitty. We are working on positive kitty and toddler interactions. C gets too excited and Rufus is not here for it.

C is not currently using his bed, so Rufus has claimed it.

In Conclusion

I might finally be in the right headspace to start posting here again. Last October, my job responsibilities changed and consumed the sliver of free mental energy I had left. Now things have stabilized and I’ve gotten past some personal milestones. I deeply envy creative people who are driven and/or energized by parenthood – look at all the women who started businesses or wrote books when their kids were infants, I mean, SenLinYu wrote Manacled on her phone in the middle of the night! I have had the opposite experience. Early parenthood has drained me to a shell of myself. I’m just now starting to have moments when I feel like an actualized human. I’ve always known that the preschool years would not be my strongest area, but this has surpassed even my low bar. Maybe I’ll be that energized mom when C is a teenager.

Anyway, happy spring everyone!

4 Comments + Posted in: life lately, month in review

Dec

My Year in Books: 2023

I wish I could write deep thoughts about my top books of the year, as I normally do, but that’s time I do not have. So here’s a basic list of everything I read in 2023. My favorites are in bold. I’m happy to discuss any of these books!

Fiction

The Light Pirate by Lily Brooks-Dalton
The Quarantine Princess Diaries by Meg Cabot
Georgie, All Along by Kate Clayborn
Every Summer After by Carley Fortune
Ellie is Cool Now by Victoria Fulton
You, Again by Kate Goldbeck
Happy Place by Emily Henry
The Displacements by Bruce Holsinger
The World We Make by N.K. Jemisin
Whiskers and Lies (Magical Cats #14) by Sofie Kelly
The English Teacher by Lily King
When You Get the Chance by Emma Lord
A Court of Frost and Starlight by Sarah J. Maas
A Court of Mist and Fury by Sarah J. Maas
A Court of Silver Flames by Sarah J. Maas
A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J. Maas
A Court of Wings and Ruin by Sarah J. Maas
House of Earth and Blood by Sarah J. Maas
House of Sky and Breath by Sarah J. Maas
Reign by Katharine McGee
Beloved by Toni Morrison
Hello Beautiful by Ann Napolitano
We All Want Impossible Things by Catherine Newman
Burn Our Bodies Down by Rory Power
Divine Rivals by Rebecca Ross
Poster Girl by Veronica Roth
Scattered Showers by Rainbow Rowell
Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfeld
Forget Me Not by Julie Soto
Memphis by Tara M. Stringfellow
The Roughest Draft by Emily Wibberley and Austin Siegemund-Broka

Nonfiction

I Hope This Finds You Well: Poems by Kate Baer
The Cross and the Lynching Tree by James H. Cone
Come Fly the World: The Jet-Age Story of the Women of Pan Am by Julia Cooke
Whatever Happened to Pudding Pops?: The Lost Toys, Tastes, and Trends of the 70s and 80s by Gael Fashingbauer Cooper
How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by KC Davis
Monsters: A Fan’s Dilemma by Claire Dederer
Platonic: How the Science of Attachment Can Help You Make—and Keep—Friends by Dr. Marisa G. Franco
Call Us What We Carry: Poems by Amanda Gorman
Four Views on Hell by Stanley Gundry et al.
Transforming: The Bible & the Lives of Transgender Christians by Austen Hartke
Paris: The Memoir by Paris Hilton
Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be by Dr. Becky Kennedy
When the Heart Waits: Spiritual Direction for Life’s Sacred Questions by Sue Monk Kidd
Live Learn Love Well: Lessons from a Life of Progress Not Perfection by Emma Lovewell
Local by Jessica Machado
I’m Glad My Mom Died by Jenette McCurdy
Bad Vibes Only by Nora McInerny
From Hollywood with Love: The Rise and Fall (and Rise Again) of the Romantic Comedy by Scott Meslow
All My Knotted-Up Life: A Memoir by Beth Moore
Pageboy by Elliot Page
Momfluenced: Inside the Maddening, Picture-Perfect World of Mommy Influencer Culture by Sara Petersen
This Here Flesh: Spirituality, Liberation, and the Stories That Make Us by Cole Arthur Riley
Laundry Love: Finding Joy in a Common Chore by Patric Richardson
Hello, Molly!: A Memoir by Molly Shannon
You Could Make This Place Beautiful: A Memoir by Maggie Smith
Will by Will Smith
Humans of New York: Stories by Brandon Stanton
Drama Free: A Guide to Managing Unhealthy Family Relationships by Nedra Glover Tawwab
The Life Council: 10 Friends Every Woman Needs by Laura Tremaine

Fanfiction

My Harry Potter fanfic journey began in March, shortly after starting to read the Court of Thorns and Roses series. TikTok served me a video about some epic Dramione fanfic called Manacled and I was intrigued. Several days later, after devouring the most brilliant tragedy I have ever read, I needed a palate cleanser. Once again TikTok recommended Remain Nameless, which along with DMATMOOBIL is my favorite book I read in 2023, period. I have already re-read chunks of it several times. Anyway, I spent more time reading fanfic on my phone this year than I did reading “real books,” and I won’t apologize for it because it honestly saved my sanity. The following list only includes novel-length fics.

Remember Us as War (but call us forgiveness) by Anyaparadox
Isolation by bexchan
Divination for Skeptics by Olivie Blake
Perfectly in Pieces by CDLynn
Timeless by Alexandra Emerson
Another Way by Alexandra Emerson
Anywhere by Alexandra Emerson
Fourteen Days by Alexandra Emerson
The Fallout by everythursday
The Eagle’s Nest by HeartofAspen
Remain Nameless by HeyJude19
Draco Malfoy and the Mortifying Ordeal of Being in Love by isthisselfcare
The Right Thing to Do by Lovesbitca8
All the Wrong Things by Lovesbitca8
The Auction by Lovesbitca8
Wait and Hope by mightbewriting
Beginning and End by mightbewriting
Bending Light by Scully Murphy
Falling Dark by Scully Murphy
Green Light by Serene Musafir
A Dress with Pockets by Pacific Rimbaud
Love and Other Historical Accidents by Pacific Rimbaud
Rosemary for Remembrance by rubbersoul02
Things We Say in the Dark by rubbersoul02
Manacled by SenLinYu
The Disappearances of Draco Malfoy by speechwriter
Apple Pies and Other Amends by toeatapeach
Various Storms and Saints by viridianatnight

2023 Totals

Fiction (published): 31

Nonfiction: 29

Fanfiction: 28

2023 Total – published works: 60 books

2023 Total – counting fanfic: 88 books

1 Comment + Posted in: reading, year end

Dec

The 2023 Soundtrack

I’ve been making annual soundtracks since 2002 (i.e. over 20 years), and all that time I’ve had a rule about no duplicate artists. This year I’m blowing that rule to smithereens.

Special – Lizzo feat. SZA // I got to see Lizzo in May (pre-cancellation) and it was a great experience!

You First – Paramore // I was so excited for a new album by my favorite band, but sadly This is Why doesn’t really hit for me. This is my favorite track, partly for the brilliant line Turns out I’m living in a horror film / Whеre I’m both the killer and the final girl.

CUFF IT – Beyonce // In addition to being really fun, this song was on the radio a lot while I was reading A Court of Mist and Fury and I could not help but giggle while associating the two. Chapter 55, IYKYK

Not Strong Enough – boygenius // 2023 was the year I finally caught on to boygenius, just in time to see them make a cameo at the Eras Tour!! (Julien Baker is a Memphian – I saw her at Music Fest like a decade ago.)

Waffle House – Jonas Brothers // What’s not to like about a catchy, wholesome tale of brothers working out their issues in a greasy spoon?

Empty Nest – Silversun Pickups // This band has such a unique sound. I’ve loved all their singles.

if i were a fish – corook feat. Olivia Barton // Speaking of wholesome, this artist turned up on my TikTok FYP with this musical response to some mean comments they were getting. It’s so uplifting, and even safe to sing with your kids!

Let’s Fall in Love for the Night – FINNEAS // This was on my Dramione playlist at one point in its formation process, and I got attached to it.

Cruel Summer – Taylor Swift // I barely noticed this song when Lover came out, but man did it become The Song of The Tour and therefore of a year. Every time I hear it, for the rest of my life, I will remember this summer and shout-sing I’M DRUNK IN THE BACK OF THE CAR AND I CRIED LIKE A BABY COMING HOME FROM THE BAR.

Salute – Little Mix // I want to say Peloton was involved in introducing me to this song. When that bass hits, I feel like I could straight up run through a wall.

We Didn’t Start the Fire – Fall Out Boy // It was about time someone rewrote this classic for our generation. If you pay attention, some of the match-ups to the original are impressive.

Dance the Night – Dua Lipa // This is so sparkly and fun. EVERY NIGHT IS GIRLS’ NIGHT!

Lavender Haze (Snakehips Remix) – Taylor Swift // I’m always looking for interesting covers and remixes. I feel like this one really elevates the already-great source material.

What Was I Made For? – Billie Eilish // I know I’m not the only woman in her 40s who cried at the Barbie movie and also the first few times she listened to this song.

The Well – Briscoe // The world is on fire, so let’s play some banjos.

Blame Brett – The Beaches // A total bop narrated by a self-aware woman dealing with her breakup in an unhealthy way.

Ant Pile – Dominic Fike // I feel like this song is a spiritual cousin to Teenage Dirtbag?

Free – Florence + The Machine // This song captures the two sides of me:“You’re too sensitive”, they said / I said, “Okay, but let’s discuss this at the hospital.” + “I always want to dance. And if I don’t, call a doctor.” – Jess King

evermore – Taylor Swift feat. Bon Iver // I have felt this song in my bones this year. I also can’t stop thinking about Taylor playing this as a surprise song mid-tour and looking like a huge weight had lifted off her shoulders.

So Much (For) Stardust – Fall Out Boy // This whole album is good and brings the drama. It feels appropriate to end on an operatic note when this year has been personally and globally tough.

Past Years: 2022 // 2021 // 2020 // 2019 // 2018 // 2017 // 2016 // 2015 // 2014

Add a Comment + Posted in: music, year end

Aug

Big Summer Catch-Up

Greetings, long-lost friends! For the last three months, I’ve struggled to put these posts together until it felt too late in the month to do so. I’ve had no energy + distraction-free time to write anything down. It can be a lot of work just to get through the day. So I’m about to feel accomplished when this goes up!

Main Events

Item 1: I am now the mom of a two-year-old! This feels both crazy and appropriate. We had a Wheels on the Bus party for C in the backyard, with friends and neighbors and water entertainment. Everyone had fun – I felt a lot more relaxed than I did at his first birthday party. When I look at these pictures, I see how much C has grown (physically and as a person) in a short time. He is talking up a storm, building social skills and humor, has strong opinions, loves music and books (yay!), is coloring and building with blocks, knows the alphabet and can count to ten. I’m really proud of him. Also so thankful for the great preschool he now attends.

Item 2: This Taylor Swift Eras Tour Summer will live in my heart forever! I was #blessed to attend Night 2 in Nashville at the beginning of May, with my sister Debra and her best friend Erin. The three of us went to the Speak Now tour together, forever ago, and were able to continue the tradition thanks to Erin staying in the Ticketmaster queue all day. We met up in Nashville the morning of the show and headed down early for the full SwiftieCon experience.

Our seats were almost at the top of the stadium, but we could still see everything! The entire time, I was filled with the kind of collective joy that I usually only feel about sports. The energy was amazing and so was the show. Best concert of my life (so far).

We packed snacks for our long wait to get out of the parking lot!

All summer I’ve loved watching videos and following the various events on the tour. I believe documentaries will be made about it someday, and I’ll get to tell C I was there. To extend the fun, I am throwing myself a Swiftie birthday party. You’ll hear all about it next month!

Item 3: Taylor and I celebrated our fourth anniversary. It was on a Thursday, and we just exchanged cards and then he cooked dinner for me. In fact, we had to spend some of the evening emptying my parents’ fridge into a dumpster after a power outage. #realmarriedlife This sort of tracks with our other anniversaries (two of which happened in lockdown). Taylor says we’ll take a nice trip next year for our fifth. Fingers crossed.

Reading

Three months of books. Here we go!!

How to Keep House While Drowning: A Gentle Approach to Cleaning and Organizing by KC Davis (5 stars) If you follow KC on TikTok or Insta, this short book is a collection of her greatest hits, which feel even more helpful and powerful all together. This is a message so many of us need.

Four Views on Hell, ed. Stanley N. Gundry (3 stars) My church book club decided to read this in May, since some of us only recently learned that there’s more than one perspective on hell!! We skipped all the smarmy rebuttals, but the actual viewpoints were interesting.

Transforming: The Bible & the Lives of Transgender Christians by Austen Hartke (4 stars) We read this for July book club. A very approachable, personal, and well-written book.

Happy Place by Emily Henry (4 stars) EH has become an automatic-purchase author for me. Her latest is about a group of friends on their annual coastal vacation, and the couple who hasn’t told the others that they broke up.

Remain Nameless by HeyJude19 (5 stars) In April, Manacled was my gateway drug into Dramione fanfiction. I saw a lot of people recommend the rom-commy Remain Nameless as a palate cleanser, and I loved it so much that I read it again a week later! This fic begins with Hermione and Draco, now in their late 20s and trying to heal their post-war trauma, running into each other at a Muggle coffee shop. It’s swoony and as relatable as a story set in the wizarding world can be, and this Ginny is fantastic. More on my fanfic deep dive in a minute.

Draco Malfoy and the Mortifying Ordeal of Being in Love by isthisselfcare (5 stars) This fanfic is set 15 years after the war and features Auror Draco being Hermione’s bodyguard as she works on a secret project that’s earning her death threats. It’s a bantery adventure and an absolute delight. I really regret that it can never be a movie.

Live Learn Love Well: Lessons from a Life of Progress Not Perfection by Emma Lovewell (3 stars) Emma is one of my favorite Peloton instructors, and it was fun to read stories from her life.

House of Sky and Breath by Sarah J. Maas (3.5 stars) Like its predecessor, this book was brilliant in spots and interminable in others. I thought I was never going to get to the payoff. So ready for the ACOTAR/Crescent City crossover!! I know I need to knock out the Throne of Glass series too, but I’m not there yet.

All My Knotted-Up Life: A Memoir by Beth Moore (4.5 stars) We read this for June’s church book club. If you have ever heard of Beth Moore, I recommend this.

From Hollywood with Love: The Rise and Fall (and Rise Again) of the Romantic Comedy by Scott Maslow (3.5 stars) A brief history of the rom-com.

Scattered Showers by Rainbow Rowell (4 stars) A short story collection with check-ins on most of her past characters, and some really creative new stories.

Hello, Molly!: A Memoir by Molly Shannon (3.5 stars) A fun and moving memoir. I loved hearing about everything Mary Katherine Gallagher.

Romantic Comedy by Curtis Sittenfeld (3.5 stars) A writer for a late-night comedy show has sparks with a guest host, but his fame makes her feel too insecure. Then they get a second chance. I think this is the first novel I’ve read that incorporates the pandemic.

Humans of New York: Stories by Brandon Stanton (4 stars) I’ve been meaning to look at this forever. Good stuff.

Memphis by Tara M. Stringfellow (4.5 stars) A moving novel about three generations of women in a house in North Memphis, their community, and their brushes with history.

Will by Will Smith with Mark Manson (3.5 stars) I was iffy about this since Will Smith hasn’t been a super reliable narrator lately, but it was better than I thought? I definitely understand him better.

The Roughest Draft by Emily Wibberley and Austin Siegmund-Broka (3.5 stars) A pair of successful co-writers are forced to fulfill their contract and write one more book together, despite the fact that they haven’t spoken in four years. This was predictable, but romantic and it’s set in Key Largo!

In My Dramione Era

Above are most of my favorite Dramione fics that I’ve read since falling down the rabbit hole in April. This relationship has clearly become my coping mechanism, but oh well. I owe it all to the TikTok algorithm that showed me a random video about Manacled. I’m currently only counting five-star reads in my book totals, which means an embarrassing number of words is going unlogged. If you are also Dramione trash, please reach out as I have no one to discuss with!! The three below are my GOATs and I’d recommend reading them in this order. I think DMATMOOBIL might be enjoyable even if you’ve never read Harry Potter.

Watching

The Barbie movie was so good!! I did not expect to cry. You can read America Ferrerra’s monologue here, IYKYK.

I have also watched Air (really good) and the miniseries Love and Death (Elizabeth Olsen was flawless, and I was obsessed with her pre-trial haircut). I never really watched Succession, because I have a low tolerance for horrible people being horrible, but I knew enough to want to watch the finale. Taylor correctly predicted the… successor.

Listening

The Barbie soundtrack is solid.

And this brought joy to me and the rest of the class of 97:

Summer Fun

We enjoyed our annual Redbirds outing with the friends I used to go to the Redbirds with, like, weekly. C was more into it this year, pointing and saying “baseball!”

More snapshots of our summer:

Botanic Gardens with BFFs Kara and Ollie

Travel

I went to Hollywood Beach not once, but TWICE in July! We took a family trip with all my in-laws over Fourth of July weekend. We got a condo Airbnb just off the boardwalk – I could still see our balcony while in the ocean. It was perfect and I wanted to move in permanently. Since my last update, C has developed a terror of the bath and I was worried how that would translate on a beach vacation. Happily, he had fun in the pool and the ocean! Guess I can start thinking about swim lessons again!

My uncle took Taylor, me, and my MIL out on his new boat!

We also visited my grandfather – my last grandparent standing. He turned 90 in January!

A few weeks after our trip, my mom, sister and nieces had plans to go to Hollywood Beach too. Since our grandfather is getting a little frail, my brother decided to join in on the trip with his family so they could visit him. Meanwhile, I’ve been trying to get out west to visit Kevin all summer and nothing has worked out. Taylor suggested I fly down for the now-big sibling trip instead! I was able to get a room at the same resort, just a few blocks from the Fourth of July place.

On the boat again! Note: I can testify to the Atlantic record heat, because Biscayne Bay was creepily warm. It was sweltering in general this entire trip. I can’t remember the last time I was just as uncomfortable in South Florida (ocean breeze) as Memphis (oven). We ate outside a couple of times and felt like we might pass out.

One night we watched a beautiful sunset from the boat, and the next night we saw dolphins! I was so excited to get this shot of the dolphin with the Miami skyline.

At Home

After over three years in our house, my greenhouse is fully complete and functional!! Taylor took out all the glass and replaced it with corrugated plastic, which will hopefully not shatter every time a tree branch falls. This is the first time the greenhouse has actually been sealed! We can now safely winter the lemon tree in there, and I should be able to grow some cool season crops. I also have a potting bench!

We semi-purposely let one side of the backyard grow wild. As a result, we get a lot of wildlife. Chipmunks, a rabbit family, and lots of birds!

Meanwhile, I overhauled our cat litter situation, because the odor was becoming a problem. I implemented everything a church friend/cat expert told me to do. Rufus now has a litter genie and official litter genie brand box, filled with Fresh & Natural cat litter from Hollywood Feed. HIGHLY RECOMMEND this equipment if you have a cat.

Since May, a cleaner has been coming to our house every other week. It’s a huge help. Honestly life-changing. I was barely staying on top of basic chores and felt pretty hopeless. Now that I know the house WILL get cleaned again soon, keeping up seems more manageable.

Beauty

My favorite products this summer:

Megababe Thigh Rescue. Everyone do yourself a favor and buy it. You have suffered enough.
Pearlessence Hydrating Makeup Remover. This is only available at Marshalls and TJMaxx (where I saw it and thought, why not). It works better than even Clinique Take the Day Off, feels amazing, and cost a whopping 4 bucks. If they stop carrying it I’m going to be very sad.
Curlsmith Hydro Style Flexi Jelly. The good news is, I think my long search for a new everyday hair gel is over. The bad news is, *flying money emoji*
SeoulCeuticals Vitamin C serum. It’s an actual serum, not a lotion like Kiehl’s (which I was using before).
Eczema Honey eye cream. Wish I’d known about this two years ago!
Elemis pro-collagen night cream: this sample came in my Ipsy bag and smells/feels wonderful, but the cost for a full size made me swoon, so this will probably be it.
Not pictured: IT Cosmetics CC Cream with SPF. Great summer foundation.

In June, feeling bleah about the eternal quest to cover my grays, I tried Overtone Rose Gold for Brown Hair. I wanted something fun and was a little nervous it would be too much, but after two applications, no one could tell any difference. BOO. I then discovered that my usual, Natural Instincts, has a rose gold shade. I was much happier with those results!

Wearing

Since becoming a mom, I have constantly lost things. Important things, like my phone and wallet. It’s gotten worse, and of course every incident made me feel worse about myself. I decided I needed a larger, quality purse with enough room for C’s important things, so I wouldn’t have to move my stuff to and from a diaper bag anymore. After some research I got the Cairo bag from Elkie & Co. It has multiple strap options, tons of pockets, and a washable lining. In addition to everything I could need, it easily holds a few diapers, snacks, a sippy cup, and C’s tablet. I’m loving it so far.

I got this floral romper at Old Navy. They also have it in gingham and a few solids.

This summer, I’ve done a lot of shopping for a particular type of dress. Casual, but nice enough to wear to work or to lead liturgy. Nothing super short. Nothing too fitted. Nothing requiring a weird bra. NO ZIPPERS. I’ve bought several dresses from Pact (including this one) and am pretty happy with them.

These earrings from Target are great.

Random Happiness

The true community vibe at my church is one of the best things in my life these days. I was able to attend a church women’s swim, which was exciting enough, and then we saw this great rainbow.

I found this rearview mirror decoration while looking for a license plate frame. I’m not usually into this kind of thing, but in this case I needed it.

I bought this set of rabbit abstracts for $20 at a neighborhood yard sale. I don’t have anywhere to hang them right now because we’re maxed out on art, but I had to have them. The top left is my favorite. I had it propped up on my dresser for a while.