Saturday Night Widows: The Adventures of Six Friends Remaking Their Lives by Becky Aikman (5 stars)
I cannot say enough about this memoir – I’ve wanted to give it its own post. I only wish I had read it sooner. A few years after her husband died, journalist Becky Aikman gathered five other widows together to form an optimistic, forward-thinking support group – no Five Stages of Grief allowed. This is the story of their first year together, along with interesting research about grief, recovery, and relationships. The best way to describe my feelings about this book is that I want to give it a big hug. While I was divorced and not widowed, certain aspects of my situation have caused me to relate more to widows than other divorced women. Like Aikman, I’ve felt like a misfit among misfits as I’ve rebuilt my life. Reading these brave ladies’ stories and being a virtual party to their conversations made me feel 100% less alone. It reassured and encouraged me SO MUCH, and I’m so thankful they were willing to share.
At Least You’re In Tuscany by Jennifer Criswell (4 stars)
I reviewed this here.
Levitating Las Vegas by Jennifer Echols (3 stars)
I reviewed this here.
Bright Young Things by Anna Godbersen(4 stars)
If you loved Anna Godbersen’s Victorian Luxe series, you will love her new series set in the eleventh hour of the Roaring 20s. Cordelia and Letty, two best friends from small-town Ohio, run away to NYC in the summer of 1929. Though they expect to find their fortunes together, they’re quickly separated. Letty becomes a cigarette girl in a speakeasy on her way to stardom. Cordelia finds her long-lost father (a wealthy gangster), and a new friend in the spoiled but lovable Astrid. Nothing goes as expected for any of the three girls. The prologue declares that by the end of the series, one of them will be married, one will be a star, and one will be dead. So I’m committed to the ride. :)
Books for April: 4
2013 year to date: 22
Today is Niecy’s first birthday! I can’t believe she’s already been with us a whole year! The world got better when she arrived in it. :)
1 Comment + Posted in: book reviews, reading
Linking up with HopefulLeigh for What I’m Into! My list isn’t as extensive or organized as hers, but it’s a good current summary.
Steve Madden Heaven flats and Old Navy tank dresses. I bought a pair of faux snake Heaven flats last fall and have worn them pretty much nonstop. So last weekend I bought two more pairs (one in metallic, to replace some falling-apart Target flats, and some purple ones on eBay). They’re so comfortable and go with everything. As for the dresses, I have the poplin-crepe sundress in two colors and the jersey tank dress in two colors, and can already tell they’ll be getting a LOT of wear this summer!
Revolution. I caught up on four episodes of this show over the weekend, and saw the new one last night. YOU GUYS, IT’S GETTING GOOD. They’ve brought in interesting new characters, added a few twists, and revealed enough information that I don’t feel strung along. Also, there’s no other way to say it – Charlie has successfully transformed from meek and mousy into a total badass. I love the growing bond and respect between her and her uncle.
Also: Hawaii Life on HGTV. I’ve never been to Hawaii, and this show makes me want to go even more. I’m entranced by it. You learn a little about the local culture AND look at gorgeous scenery and pretty houses.
Edy’s single-serving ice cream cups. I’ve been addicted to these for a while, but lately I have one almost every night.
Spring flowers! I’m overwhelmed by the beauty and color around town. The azaleas are in full, glorious bloom right now. The lawns and trees have all greened up. I bought a few new flowers for my yard last weekend. The vegetable garden won’t go in for another couple of weeks, though. It’s still a little chilly most days and the ground is still very saturated. I won’t have tomatoes until, like, August, but it’s okay.
Jancee Dunn. I just started her memoir/journalism advice book, But Enough About Me, and have been laughing out loud on almost every page at her family stories. Her new biography of Cyndi Lauper just moved up my to-read list! I read her novel, Don’t You Forget About Me, a few years ago and it was an instant classic comfort read.
How about you?
6 Comments + Posted in: what i'm into
Every so often, life sneakily builds up on me until I’m at a breaking point. Over the last month or two, I’ve spent most of my lunch hours rushing to appointments, crossing tasks off my to-do list (stressing all the while about getting back to work late), or leaving early so I could go out of town or meet a service person at my house… then scrambling around attending events and stuff in the evenings and on weekends. I realize that this is normal life to many people, but personally, I can only power through for so long. I felt stressed constantly and couldn’t deal with it anymore. Even after taking some time to relax last weekend, I hadn’t come out of my mental fog.
So last Friday, I took a vacation day just to catch up on my life. I accomplished most of my nagging to-dos in that one day!* It’s crazy how much easier it is to get things done in the daytime. Even though I slept in, by noon, I had already visited the car tag office** and gotten my tires rotated at Wal-Mart (and easily did the shopping while I waited). In just a few hours, I knocked out a list of errands that would have taken forever individually on a night or weekend. It was incredibly liberating. Then, with nothing hanging over my head, I was able to HAVE A WEEKEND. I had time for a leisurely brunch with a friend, reading, napping, catching up on my DVR, and even renting a movie (which has become the height of luxury to me for some reason).
I’ve concluded that my life would be vastly improved if I could have one Errand Day per month. One day (or even half-day) solely devoted to Doing All The Things, during which no one is allowed to call and redirect my plans or ask me for anything. Sometimes I feel ridiculous struggling to manage everything as a single woman. I sense mothers rolling their eyes at me thinking, How hard can it be? (and seriously, working mothers, I don’t know how you do it). But as my friend and I agreed this weekend, single women are solely responsible for managing our own households. Even if it’s only a household of one (and pets), we’re doing it all on our own with no help and little time.*** As I’ve said before, single homeownership is not for the fainthearted. In addition to home responsibilities, most single women juggle busy social schedules to meet our needs for interaction… not to mention the time-suck of “putting ourselves out there” at every opportunity in the faint hope of meeting someone (because, as people love to remind us, God will not deliver the right man to our door). This is especially draining for me as an introvert, which is probably why I have these occasional breakdowns. I want to live a full and interesting life. I also want to know when I’m still single and too old to have children that I did everything I could. But often, all I really want is to stay happily at home with my cats and a good book and have it be okay.
Anyway, taking that day was one of the best things I’ve done for myself in a while. I can’t really afford to do that as often as I’d like to, but in the future, I’ll be less hesitant to take the time when stuff starts piling up. It’s worth it.
* = The main thing I didn’t do: call Comcast to cancel/negotiate my cable. I can’t pay their exorbitant costs anymore, but I don’t understand the competitors’ cable/internet options and false advertising and hidden installation fees, and I also dread calling and arguing with them. SOMEONE PLEASE HELP.
** = Heads up: if you buy a car outside Shelby County and keep your old tag, it will NOT be transferred automatically. Even if the dealership said they would handle it, and you received completed transfer paperwork from the Tennessee Department of Whatever.
*** = This is still fathoms better than managing a household of two with no help and little time. (Been there, done that.) But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
4 Comments + Posted in: life lately, singleness
Levitating Las Vegas, the first non-YA novel by Jennifer Echols, was born via a writing prompt from Diana Peterfreund: “A young woman confronts her parents after discovering that she has inherited telekinetic powers.” The concept was a perfect match for Echols’ fascination with Las Vegas and its people, and she ran with it, winning NaNoWriMo with flying colors. You can read more about that here on her blog. While I plowed through Levitating Las Vegas and thought it explored some interesting ideas, overall I might like its origin story better than the actual book.
All her life, Holly has been a showgirl in her family’s magic act at a Vegas casino. Her classmate/crush, Elijah, and his mother also work at the casino. When they’re fourteen, Holly and Elijah both experience the onset of intense powers – telekinesis and mind-reading, respectively – after their parents inexplicably forbid them to date each other. Both are told by their parents that they have a dangerous mental illness, must never tell anyone about it, and must take medication to keep their delusions of power under control. Seven years later, Holly and Elijah are still walking the line and keeping their distance from one another. Then their medication suddenly becomes unavailable. Terrified of going crazy, and newly aware that they’re both mentally ill, they go on a road trip together to the city where their medication is made. There, they begin to discover that there’s much more to their powers, their history, their families and friends, and the casino they grew up in than they’d ever imagined.
I have mixed feelings about this novel. Vegas is full of characters and craziness that you won’t find anywhere else, and I agree that it’s ripe for fantastical plots. The pacing of the story was great – as I said, I had a hard time putting it down. It would make a fun movie. Romance-wise, revisiting a lost first love is one of my favorite plotlines. The ethical dilemmas raised by having strong manipulative powers are also fascinating. But something about Levitating Las Vegas just rang a little false for me. It seemed a little unpolished. I couldn’t totally suspend my disbelief, and I couldn’t totally trust Elijah as a character (but maybe we’re not supposed to). I was bothered by many of his actions and his claims that they were for Holly’s own good. I also felt excessively stressed at several points – much more so than usual while reading a suspenseful book. Maybe this narrative pushed some personal buttons I haven’t identified.
Bottom line, I enjoyed Levitating Las Vegas. But I was slightly disappointed after LOVING the only other Echols book I’ve read, Major Crush. I’ll have to try some of her other stuff.
Recommended for fans of: superhero stories, Justine Larbalestier’s Magic or Madness trilogy
Disclaimer: I received this book for free from NetGalley in exchange for an honest review.
Add a Comment + Posted in: book reviews
When I chose Focus as my One Word for 2013, I intended to post about it monthly-ish to keep me accountable. Since I’m doing a pretty poor job of Focusing, I’ve procrastinated on the updates. It’s hard to be accountable when you’re not even sure what you’re supposed to be doing. All I know is that I began this year, like many other years of my life, feeling overwhelmed and scattered. I knew I needed to prioritize and figure out the best uses of my energy.
Most importantly, I wanted to get serious about this blog and about finding more writing (and editing) opportunities. Even if I don’t have much to show for it, I have made a start in that area. I’m more confident in what I want this blog to be and not to be, even if that means I miss out on the instant popularity provided by a more commercial approach. Aside from the blog, I’m soaking up information from experienced freelance writers and creative people. I’ve identified group blogs and websites with messages that resonate with me. I’ve responded to calls for guest posts, gotten no feedback, and decided that apparently I’m out of my league (while simultaneously at a loss to find a place that’s in my league). Most successful writers experience years of rejection, but I fear I’m going to be, like, 80 years old, still trying, and still have zero published pieces of any kind to my name. My niece’s future children will be like, “What’s wrong with Great-Aunt B?” “Oh she just got another rejection from Today’s Elderly Christian Woman.”
The thing is, writing is supposed to be what I want to do, a source of happiness and fulfillment. Not to say it should always be easy – there’s a deep satisfaction in doing difficult things when we know we’re meant to do them. But if writing is reduced to a source of frustration at my continual lack of “success” as defined by others, I shouldn’t be doing it. I need to think about my motives. I have this misguided idea that if God has called me to write, and I’m not on my way to reaching the masses, I’m letting Him down. In the words of an empowering blog post I read last night, the world “increasingly equates being extraordinary with the right to exist.” If I’m just an average person sharing my average thoughts with a few people, what right do I have to speak? At the same time, I feel increasingly convicted that I don’t take myself seriously enough as a writer. If I do have a calling, I need to own it regardless of whom I’ve written for, how big my audience is, or who thinks I’m any good. I could say my writing still matters even if only a few people care about it. But (if I could just believe this), the truth is, it matters even if only I care about it. Writing is the way I process everything. It’s how I know I am alive. If my writing only makes sense of life or glorifies God to myself, it’s enough. Seeking growth and working toward goals is healthy. Striving as an end unto itself is unhealthy. It can be a fine line.
So, that’s my career-y Focus right now.
11 Comments + Posted in: one word 365, the writing life