Last week I started my day with this incredible almost-double rainbow, and I’m starting this post with it too, followed by our street’s famous arch of crepe myrtles in bloom! I hope to get more good pictures of the trees once MLGW removes all the cones and barriers from a recent project.
Reading
The Heir Affair by Heather Cocks and Jessica Morgan (5 stars) Sequel to The Royal We, one of my favorite novels of the last decade! These characters feel like old friends, and the intensity and juiciness of the plot was a great escape. Without saying too much, I also really related to one of the plot points. Love.
Tides by Betsy Cornwell (3 stars) This YA/New Adult selkie fairy tale had been on my TBR for several years. It was a quick and pleasant read, but a little too fanciful for me right now.
Native: Identity, Belonging, and Rediscovering God by Kaitlin B. Curtice (3.5 stars) Read with Sarah Bessey’s Field Notes community. These are Curtice’s insightful reflections on being an Indigenous woman in America and in Christian spaces. I highlighted many passages and now want to include more Native American perspective in my reading. I didn’t rank it higher only because I felt like it got a little repetitive.
A Second Blooming: Becoming the Women We Are Meant to Be by Susan Cushman et al. (3 stars) A looong time ago, I attended a couple of meetings of a group called Write Memphis. Turns out this collection of essays includes several writers connected with that group. The essays take a lot of angles on the topic of “second blooming” and some are excellent, but others were, strangely, more like anecdotes with a resume tacked on to the end.
Something Other than God: How I Passionately Sought Happiness and Accidentally Found It by Jennifer Fulwiler (3 stars) Back in the day, I was a fan of Jennifer Fulwiler’s blog, so her memoir has also been on my TBR for a long time. This is her story of coming to faith after being a lifelong atheist. It was okay, but kind of turned into an advertisement for Catholicism.
My Sergei: A Love Story by Ekaterina Gordeeva (5 stars) Spontaneous comfort reread of one of my all-time favorites! It’s been probably ten years since I last read it, and wow, do a lot of things hit different.
How We Fight For Our Lives by Saeed Jones (4 stars) Read with one of my book clubs. I heard lots of advance praise for this memoir about being a gay Black man in the South. It wasn’t quite what I expected, and tough to read in spots, but Jones is a great and arresting writer.
Dot Journaling: A Practical Guide: How to Start and Keep the Planner, To-Do List, and Diary That’ll Actually Help You Get Your Life Together by Rachel Wilkerson Miller (4 stars) This is exactly what it sounds like, and a great resource if you’re looking to start a journal/planner habit. I’m in the process of incorporating some of these ideas into my existing planner routine, rather than ditching everything to go full dot journal. More on this later.
Island Affair by Priscilla Oliveras (3 stars) The first of a series of romances set in the Keys (which is what caught my interest). When Sara’s boyfriend stands her up for an important family vacation in Key West, she recruits Luis, a local firefighter down on his luck, to pose as her boyfriend for the week. It’s a predictable plotline, but it has a lot of heart.
Chosen Ones by Veronica Roth (4.5 stars) I love the concept of what happens to young heroes after they defeat the villain. In this case, Sloan and her four hero counterparts, now adults, are struggling with fame, PTSD, and ennui. Then they find themselves in a weird parallel universe where The Dark One is still alive. I don’t read many series anymore because it’s such a commitment, but I will always make an exception for Veronica Roth. I think we would be friends, because something about her writing – like, the mechanics of it – satisfies my soul.
Listening
As you might expect of someone of my demographic, I got very excited about Taylor Swift’s folklore announcement and inhaled the album last Friday morning. I think it’s her best yet – invoking her classic songwriting while reflecting her major growth as an artist. This track was my first-impression favorite, though it was hard to choose!
I’m a little behind the new-releases curve since I’m rarely in the car anymore, so I just heard this recent Killers song. They remain so good year after year.
And if you need to feel happy for a few minutes:
Watching
July was an A-plus viewing month for me. Where to start?? We watched Hamilton: The Film the weekend it dropped. It was as amazing as ever, and I loved getting to see the whole original cast. I’ve barely dipped a toe into the abundance of Disney+, but I did finally watch Frozen 2 this week and am now obsessed. Like, “Into the Unknown” and “Show Yourself” are on repeat and now I’m watching the six-part making-of documentary. Warning, the documentary is just as emotional as the movie. The Frozen stories really tap into a lot of things that are close to people’s, and I think especially women’s, hearts.
The new Baby-Sitters Club series on Netflix exceeded my expectations! Somehow they brought the stories and spirit of the original books into the current day without losing anything. The changes and additions were spot on. All the casting was perfect, but since I’m the parents’ age now (yikes), I really liked all the parent choices, especially Alicia Silverstone as Kristy’s mom.
I Also Watch Television for Adults: I’m finally getting into The Morning Show and LOVING IT. What an all-star cast. I finished the current season of The Bold Type and wish I had someone to discuss it with, as every major character except Jane was acting extremely out of character by the finale. (Related: Aisha Dee’s statement about representation in the writers’ room.)
Films That Made Me Want to Burn It All Down: Athlete A, a Netflix documentary, recounts the breaking of the Larry Nassar scandal. It’s a searing reminder of the importance of good journalism and the rampant systemic abuses still happening in plain sight. (All USA Gymnastics had to do was fire one guy, but instead they knowingly allowed the sexual abuse of 500, that’s five hundred girls.) Meanwhile, Taylor and I watched two older Denzel movies I had never seen, John Q and Glory. One about the injustice of our healthcare system, the other about the first Black battalion in the Civil War hardly getting any respect for their sacrifice and bravery.
At Home
In the wee hours of July 4th, we heard a weird crashing/swooshing noise that we thought was coming from inside the house. After looking around and finding nothing amiss or broken, we went back to bed. Later in the day, we discovered a huge limb had fallen from our neighbor’s 150-year-old oak right onto our brand-new fence. A couple of mornings later, we thought we heard the noise again… and it was another limb that took out power to the neighbor’s house. Hashtag Midtown problems. Eventually a tree service came to fix the broken areas and clear the debris (I watched all day and it was very interesting), but the fence is still broken and under some branches. We’re working on it. I’m just glad they haven’t taken the whole tree down.
Since we moved in, we’ve been looking for the right antique table for our entryway (a spot previously occupied by an IKEA cabinet). We found this one at an estate sale. I felt unsure about its ornateness and boxiness, but loved it as soon as I saw it in the space!
I made it about four months in my new bathroom before a few of its aspects started to get on my nerves. The easiest one to change was this beige-and-black striped window shade (which, combined with candle sconces, created a French bistro vibe that is not my favorite). I ordered two yards of this Kate Rhees fabric on Spoonflower, trimmed and hemmed it all around to fit the window, sewed a loop at the top for a tension rod, and strategically draped the curtain over two more tension rods for a faux Roman shade. Although it was a fairly simple process, something went wrong at every step. Lots of sweat and tears… but now I feel happy when I look at my window.
We bought a new king bed and mattress when we moved into this house, including a recommended plasticky protective sheet to go over the mattress. I loathe the feeling of the fitted sheet sliding around on the plastic sheet every time I move. It got so bad that I dreaded being in my own bed, which is obviously unacceptable. Taylor’s search for solutions led us to these corner sheet holder straps. I still can’t figure out how to put them on, but Taylor can, and they actually work! They are loosening up a little after a couple of weeks, but it’s still a big improvement. Does anyone else have problems with this?
In the Garden
We still need to paint our greenhouse and replace a few more glass panes, but I decided not to wait any longer to plant plants in it. Most of these herbs and veggies had been sitting in pots on the side of the house since May. I took this picture a few weeks ago, and many of the plants are now double the size!
My first tomato of 2020 was, true to its name, an Early Girl. It deserved to be eaten in style, so I made a caprese (the basil was also from the garden).
I cooked a spaghetti squash, and, on a whim, planted some of the scooped-out seeds in an open spot in the greenhouse. This was the result a week later. Maybe I should have given them more space!!
In the front yard, we have thriving impatiens and azalea flowers! I have never, ever seen an azalea bloom in July before.
Eating
I am all about charcuterie boards this summer. Lunch or dinner. Please tell me about your favorite charcuterie items!!
Instead of the large flag cake I’ve always made for the 4th, for this weird year, I pared down to a strawberry shortcake with lemon biscuits. For all subsequent shortcakes after this one, I crumbled up the biscuit into a bowl and mixed in the fruit and whipped cream. Delicious.
My SIL cooked a killer spaghetti squash pad Thai when we were in Wyoming. I made a janky but good version of it this month, having failed to find some of the ingredients. Hot tip: you can cook spaghetti squash on the grill instead of turning the oven on. (Our June/July MLGW bill got me coming up with all kinds of energy-saving ideas!)
Some good can come from Facebook: I’m addicted to this salad recipe someone posted, which I refer to as “bougie salad.” Spring mix, burrata, fresh peaches, fresh basil, toasted pecans, and serrano peppers (I use banana peppers from the garden), with a balsamic vinaigrette. You’re welcome.
This new lime hard seltzer from Memphis Made is refreshing. It tastes like a watered-down margarita, which is not a bad thing in my book.
Other good things I cooked this month: BLT pasta salad and avocado cucumber salad.
Making
Since 2015 (when I did a whole post about it), I’ve used a Filofax Saffiano Personal planner. After reading Dot Journaling, I decided I didn’t need to ditch my whole system to benefit from some of the ideas. Example: having topical pages with all the information about one thing in one place (like my car service schedule, or Rufus’s grooming and medical history). I ordered new tabbed inserts to mark months, and some Filofax-brand financial pages and blank dot journal pages for regular notes. I also learned that my planner size is also referred to as A6, which brings up a lot more product options in a search.
Wearing
I didn’t have any sandals that met all of my summer work-from-home needs: supportive, secure on my foot, and not too precious to get a little wet or muddy. I need to be able to pop outside for a quick walk, or to water plants or pull a few weeds. So I ordered some Chacos! I loved the look of the Z2 style with the toe loop, but read that they can be uncomfortable for people with high arches, so I went with the Z1. I’m still breaking them in.
J. Crew Factory is still running a lot of good deals. I ordered a simple tank dress (haven’t worn it yet, other than trying it on when it arrived) and had to throw in these statement earrings too!
Beauty
When Taylor changed jobs in March, we had to spend or lose our FSA, and there weren’t many FSA-eligible items. As a result, we now have several years’ supply of high-end sunscreen. I’ve been impressed with the La Roche-Posay Anthelios Tone Correcting Face Primer Sunscreen SPF 50 I got for my face! It’s effective, and really does even out my skintone. I recommend it if you’re in a similar situation or just want to splurge.
Nowadays I skip makeup much of the time (which still blows my mind). When I do wear it, I usually stick to brows (NYX Tinted Brow Mascara is still my staple), eyeliner, and Cover Girl Matte BB Cream.
Wellness
I’m doing pretty well with my new exercise schedule: elliptical three mornings a week (very early – the elliptical area at my gym is big, open, and usually deserted) and… weight training! I’ve thought about working with a personal trainer for a while, so when a friend from church who’s a weightlifter got her certification, I decided to go for it. She has a full gym in her garage, only the two of us (and sometimes her cats :)) are there, and she wears a mask and cleans everything between clients. Right now I only go once a week, because I wanted to start out slow. I’m seeing improvement each time. This week I did (assisted) pull-ups and chin-ups for the first time in my life!! That was very encouraging.
Despite the regular exercise and being somewhat more mindful about my eating, I continue to struggle with my body. I never weigh myself, but more of my clothes are getting too tight. I can’t wear things that have fit since my 20s. I have a firm, stick-out belly that might be cute to me if I was still pregnant, which I am not. Hearing about many people losing weight in quarantine makes me frustrated and depressed – how are they doing it?? I know there are a lot of valid reasons for my body changing and I’m doing the best I can, but it’s upsetting. I also dread getting cut off from the gym again for coronareasons, making the situation even worse. So fun feeling pressure to worry about my looks during a multifaceted national crisis.
Random Happiness
I got my McAlister’s free tea day to go!
Taylor and I drove out to a field in Arkansas to look for Comet Neowise. We could see it easily with binoculars, and almost with the naked eye once we knew where to look! It was so cool (and kind of romantic). I didn’t even try to take a picture – I leave astro-photography to the pros.
I haven’t seen our owls up close in weeks – they’re moving around with the seasons, as animals do. But I hear them almost every day, so they’re not too far away. I don’t think it’s a coincidence that in their absence, we’re getting daily visits from this handsome yard rabbit! I get extremely excited every time I see him/her.
My mom and I walked at Shelby Farms and saw a mom and baby deer in the middle of the day!
When I saw that Pier 1 is going out of business, I got one last Oceans candle – I had a giant one in my youth that lasted for years. It’s still a great smell. I also received a package from my friend Kelsey that included a “what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” ZOX bracelet. <3
Happy but bittersweet: my church’s head pastor, Robbyn, retired from pastoring this month to change careers. While he was a great pastor, I think we all support this decision and are excited for his next chapter. We had a socially distanced, masked goodbye party on his porch, with everyone signing up for a time slot so only a few people were there at once. It felt great to see a few people in person! I’m very thankful my church is taking a cautious, behind-the-curve approach, but I really miss going.
Your Monthly Rufus
Remember when Rufus’s new address was Top of the Cable Box? Now it’s this laundry basket. When it got too hot to keep my throw blankets on the bed, I arranged them in the basket thinking it might be a nice spot for him. He climbed right in and now spends my entire workday and every night there. No more sleeping on mom. We move the basket into the bedroom at night so we can all still be together. Taylor joked that he was going to wake up and find me in the basket too.
Sometimes in the mornings, he leaves the laundry basket for a while in favor of the mail basket we keep under the mail slot.
He’s obsessed with this IKEA clock in my bathroom. The second hand confounds him.
He’s also had a little supervised playtime in the backyard.
On the Blog
I finally wrote about my second miscarriage, which happened in April.
Good Reads
- Hemingway Writes the Baby-Sitters Club
- Leading With Vulnerability
- The best $129 I ever spent: Baby formula
- Why White Ex-Evangelicals Love Anti-Racism Culture (I really Needed a Minute after reading this.)
- What Rituals Have You Inherited?
- The Writer’s Job is to Pay Attention
- Goodbye Pier 1, the Imperialist Fantasia Rendered in Wicker
- Hey white friends: We aren’t above the newly “woke.”
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