No more counting down the hours
No more wishing you were here 
I stopped believing, although Journey told me don’t 
Before I call it a day, maybe this’ll be my year.

Happy New Year! More to come. 

PS: this is my 500th post!

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(Taken at Chamblin Bookmine, Jacksonville, Florida)

Last post of 2012!

Shadowhunters and Downworlders: A Mortal Instruments Reader, edited by Cassandra Clare
I reviewed this here.  

Edge of the Past by Jennifer Comeaux
The sequel to Life On The Edge. In the first book, Emily discovered that her skating coach and fiance, Sergei, fathered a child as a teenager with his old skating partner back in Russia. In this story, that past comes back to haunt both of them and threatens the future they’ve only begun to build. If you like figure skating and/or love conquering all, you’ll like this.  

Angry Conversations With God: A Snarky But Authentic Spiritual Memoir by Susan E. Isaacs
I’d never heard of this memoir when I saw it at McKay’s for a dollar, but it’s one of my new favorite books. Susan Isaacs is a funny, profound, natural writer with a relatable life story. If I’d read this years ago, I might not have thought it so brilliant, but her words found me at the right moment in my life. Some Christians will be offended by her “taking God to couples counseling” and essentially putting words in His mouth. But it’s clear throughout that she genuinely loves God, has sought Him all her life, but struggles to find answers where the Bible and Christian culture meet our current reality.  

Catching Jordan by Miranda Kenneally
A fun, unique YA novel. Jordan Woods is the senior quarterback of the top high school football team in Tennessee, as well as the daughter of a veteran NFL player. When a new quarterback comes to her school, Jordan fights to hang on to her position even as she fights her growing feelings for him. In the meantime, Alabama is courting her, but are they interested in her skills on the field or in making her a poster girl? And why is her lifelong best friend, Sam, acting so weird? Jordan is a fresh, real character with an uncommon story. I loved it.

Put On Your Crown: Life-Changing Moments On The Path to Queendom by Queen Latifah
I love Queen Latifah! This book is full of practical wisdom and encouragement, mostly shared through stories from her own life. She talks openly about her family, her rise to fame, career strategy, and the role faith has played in her life. I didn’t know that her brother died tragically a few years back, and her observations about grief are spot on.  

The Irrational Season by Madeleine L’Engle
This memoir (the last Crosswicks Journal I hadn’t read) is loosely set within the framework of the church calendar, starting in Advent. It’s even more stream-of-consciousness than her other journals. The general theme is how to believe in and trust a good God in a world of “wars and insane asylums,” and with so many tragedies happening recently, I found it VERY relevant. It’s almost as good as A Circle of Quiet – I wanted to highlight the whole last third of the book. Classic L’Engle.

The Age of Miracles by Karen Thompson Walker
Julia, the protagonist of this novel, is eleven years old when “the slowing” begins. Without warning, the earth starts rotating more slowly. As days and nights expand and society slowly crumbles, so does Julia’s life. Once happy and well-liked, she finds herself an outcast and discovers troubling secrets in her own family. This book is well-written and interesting, but as others have noted, it’s depressing. If you’re looking for a happy ending, you won’t find it here. (See also: Susan Beth Pfeffer’s Life As We Knew It, which is similarly bleak but even harder to put down, although you will want to put it in the freezer like Joey did with The Shining.)  

Books for December: 7  
2012 FINAL TOTAL: 69

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I’ve been making annual soundtracks – musical yearbooks – since 2002. My soundtrack is frequently on my mind throughout the year. Since I’m old school and limit it to what will fit on a CD, the final selection usually requires multiple tweakings and tough decisions. Even though I’m the only one who cares about it, it’s a labor of love.

I usually say a little something about each selection, but this year it would be very repetitive, because many songs just reflected exactly how I was feeling about something. In some cases, I liked the song purely for itself. For others it was a combination. So if I have an observation, I’ll make it, and if it was a strong “This is my life” choice, I’ll just star it. Okay? Okay.

1. Afterlife – Switchfoot
One of the first songs I glommed onto after the New Year.

2. Wishing Heart – Lisa Loeb*

3. Drive All Night – Needtobreathe
Probably my favorite track from The Reckoning. I got SO PUMPED when they played this at Music Fest.

4. Crazy Beautiful – Hanson
As a devoted Hanson fan, it’s my tradition to include one of their songs every year. I was hooked on this one in 2012 for no apparent reason. If you’re about to make an “Mmmbop” joke, go listen to the four indie albums they’ve released since then. Start with The Walk.

5. Shake It Out – Florence + The Machine
2012 was such a Florence-heavy year that I basically chose this one at random.

6. Here’s To Us – Halestorm
This was one of the numbers from Glee’s Nationals episode this year, and before it was over, I was looking up the original. Why it hasn’t taken off is beyond me. 

7. Too Close – Alex Clare
Another song that grabbed me immediately – like most people, I first heard it in a Microsoft commercial. As my brother summed up, “This song is legit.” Viva la dubstep.

8. Pieces – The Bridges
I think this came from an old Paste sampler, but I just “discovered” it on my iPod this year. The Bridges have a great, slightly retro sound.

9. Half Moon – Blind Pilot
This song opened the series finale of One Tree Hill, and even though I’d never heard it before, I knew it was the perfect choice. I can’t understand half of the lyrics, but it has a poignance that gets me every time.

10. The Age of Worry – John Mayer*

11. Part of Me – Katy Perry
Forget “I Will Survive.” To me, this is the greatest breakup/divorce anthem of all time. The first few times I heard it while running, I felt like I could run forever, and had to fight the urge to pump my fists in the air and shout-sing along. The effect is milder now, but it remains.

12. Wild Ones – Flo Rida featuring Sia
This probably seems like a throwaway choice, but of all my workout music this year, this was the song that lodged most securely in my head. Once I hear it, I’m guaranteed to be singing it for at least two days. I also have an unfortunate habit of changing popular songs to be about cats and singing them TO my cats, and this lends itself really well to that.

13. Hello – Kelly Clarkson*

14. Empire State of Mind – Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys
I trust that this one needs no explanation.

15. Lonely Boy – The Black Keys
THIS SONG ROCKS. END OF STORY. I want to do something cool enough that this song could play over the footage.

16. Some Nights – fun.*
I like “We Are Young” fine, but it’s been played to death. This song is far better, and Freddie Mercury would be so proud.

17. Hello – Karmin
I was hard pressed to choose a Karmin track, but this one never fails to energize me. And yes, this is the second song on the list named “Hello.” It is what it is.

18. Slow Down – Myla Smith
Myla’s breakout hit, which I need to hear every time! (Though, confession: “This Time I Mean It” is probably my fave from Drugs.)

19. Heartbeat – The Fray
Years after first hearing The Fray, I’ve finally become a real fan.

20. U.F.O. – Coldplay*

21. Try – Pink*

22. New Redemption Song – Over The Rhine*
As we go into a new year, this song is my prayer – for myself, and for our country, which isn’t in the happiest place. Right now I’m struggling with a (perceived) lack of redemption in my own life. I pray that God will bring bold redemption for all of us in 2013.

If you have Spotify, you can listen to this playlist here. Or if you know me in person and you want a copy, let me know!

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I do the same year-end survey every year. This post will be longer than most, so settle in!  

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?Taught yoga classes; became an aunt; ran a 5K in 36 minutes; was sworn in in a courtroom (“with a real judge and everything!”); bought a brand-new car; sewed a lot of stuff; became a sort of legit editor; missed a flight due to my own negligence; tried online dating; did Korean karaoke; went to a blogger meetup; participated in the making of a music video; officially bought season tickets to Tiger basketball; got an iPhone (love it!); planted a raised-bed vegetable garden; visited NYC and went to a Broadway show!  

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?My 2012 resolution was to make space in my life, and I did! I quit line dancing, which freed up a weeknight and made me more available. It’s brought more sanity to my life (although I miss dancing). Believe it or not, I’ve learned to relax more in general. Anyway, my 2013 resolution is a little vague (at least at this point) and I’ll talk about it later.  

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?My sister! My niece was born May 1. In college-friends births, Kathy had John (her third son!) on July 17, and MaryElaine had Matthias on June 19. My SIPster Katharine had her daughter on Valentine’s Day. And there’s a constant parade of new babies amongst my church friends.  

4. Did anyone close to you die?My paternal grandmother. We weren’t extremely close, but she was still my grandmother.  

5. What countries did you visit?None. No new states this year either.

 6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked this year?A strong sense of purpose and direction in my life, and/or at least one nice, real date with an interesting man.  

7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?February 6 – my maiden-name reclaiming day! May 1 – my niece’s birth. July 13 – I went to a Jimmy Fallon taping in NYC and got a high five from Jimmy when he ran through the audience! July 27 – I bought my car. September 1 – my grandma’s death.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?Going back to my maiden name. I’m SO glad I did it (even though my work e-mail accounts will be messed up forever).  

9. What was your biggest failure?I shouldn’t dwell on this long enough to come up with an answer. Honestly, I often feel like a failure in general.  

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?I had a bad virus in the summer, and recently a long-term cold that turned into the flu. Other than that, I’ve had a healthy 2012. I was just reflecting on how healthy I’ve been this year when I came down with this recent mess.  

11. What was the best thing you bought?My new car! It’s the nicest thing I’ve ever owned.  

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?Debra’s for being a fantastic first-time mom! And Myla’s – she had a big year and handled it with so much poise.  

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?For my own safety, they shall remain nameless.  

14. Where did most of your money go?The down payment on my car. I think I put less down on my house!  

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?Buying my car! Going to NYC! Becoming an aunt! The SIPsters trip to Jacksonville!  

16. What song will always remind you of 2012?I’ll have my 2012 tracklist up soon, but the real theme song of 2012 won’t be on that list – Call Me Maybe. There was no escaping it!  

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?About the same. I guess a little sadder, but it’s not a big deal.  

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?Seeing my niece. Going to movies. Reading the Bible. :\  

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?Dealing with my cats’ health problems. Which will hopefully be resolved VERY soon!

 20. How did you spend Christmas?With my whole immediate family here in Memphis.  

21. Did you fall in love in 2012?I fell in love with NEW YOOOOOOOOORK!!! Concrete jungle that dreams are maaaaaaade of!!! My crush on the city has reached embarrassing, Mary Anne Spier levels.  

22. What concerts did you attend this year?In reverse chronological order: Derek Webb and Page CXVI at my church; Kelly Clarkson, The Fray, and Carolina Liar in Nashville; Florence + The Machine and Needtobreathe at Music Fest; Little Big Town at the Opry.  

23. What was your favorite TV program?I really got into How I Met Your Mother! I’ve been watching new episodes as they air since last year, and I watch almost every rerun I come across, so I’ve seen most of them now. The plot and character continuity is fantastic, unlike in other shows I’ve loved that practically reinvent themselves every episode. (I’m also slowly realizing that I am the female Ted Mosby.) Among new shows, Revolution is my fave. I also like The Mindy Project.  

24. Do you dislike anyone now whom you didn’t dislike this time last year?No, I generally dislike the same (few) people! And actually, I dislike them less than I did this time last year. Small moves.  

25. What was the best book you read? 
Fiction: The Fault In Our Stars by John Green; Blackout and All Clear by Connie Willis; For Darkness Shows The Stars by Diana Peterfreund; Beautiful Ruins by Jess Walter; And All The Stars by Andrea K. Host. (I just noticed that three of these have “Stars” in the title. WEIRD.)
Non-fiction: A Praying Life by Paul Miller; The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin; Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by Mindy Kaling; Ruby Slippers: How The Soul of a Woman Brings Her Home by Jonalyn Fincher; Angry Conversations With God by Susan E. Isaacs  

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?Several of my friends have liked the Black Keys for years, but I just discovered how great they are!  

27. What did you want and get?Most of the things I mentioned on this list.  

28. What did you want and not get?See #6.  

29. What was your favorite film of this year?The Hunger Games, The Avengers, and Skyfall. But I liked all the movies I saw.  

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?I turned 33. I didn’t take off from work, but I did have lunch with Myla at Cheffie’s. My parents took me to dinner at Bonefish Grill and then showered me with Tigers merchandise.  

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? The Tigers advancing to the Final Four! I had serious intentions of going.  

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012? I’m so tired of this question. I just like to look cute!  

33. What kept you sane? My sister and friends. And vacation time.  

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Jimmy Fallon! I’ve liked him since 1998, but I was in his studio audience this year so my fandom has been re-ignited. I also gained a new appreciation for Katy Perry. I dare anyone to see her concert movie and not be impressed by her strength, and her commitment to her fans and to boldly being herself.  

35. What political issue stirred you the most? I was shamefully apathetic/cynical about politics this year. Yes, in an election year. I feel like everyone is lying anyway, and this country will be stuck in gridlock forever no matter what anyone does. But I still researched issues, and I still voted. I’m trying to have a better attitude!  

36. Who did you miss? All my friends far away.  

37. Who was the best new person you met? My niece!  

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012.  A spray painter is the BEST way to paint the exterior of a house!  

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year. 
Don’t be scared to walk alone, don’t be scared to like it 
There’s no time that you must be home, so sleep where darkness falls. 

Know your fight is not with them, yours is with your timing 
Dream your dreams, but don’t pretend, make friends with what you are. 
Give your heart, then change your mind. You’re allowed to do it. 
‘Cause God knows it’s been done to you, and somehow you got through it. 

Alive in the age of worry, rage in the age of worry 
Act your age in the age of worry and say, “Worry, get out of here!”

 – John Mayer

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