1. What did you do in 2018 that you’d never done before?
Became a notary, and swore to defend the Constitution; went to an LSU game; signed up for Stitch Fix; got serious about skincare; watched a movie filming in my own neighborhood; hiked a tiny bit of the Appalachian Trail; microchipped my pet; drank wine from a can; went to a Dave & Buster’s; stayed at a hotel on the beach in Miami with my boyfriend; discovered Reformer Pilates; saw LeBron James play in person; enjoyed the local cuisine of Cincinnati; ran a race series culminating in a half-marathon without training properly (not recommended); finally saw Wicked.
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My One Word for 2018 was Fearless. It was less about jumping out of airplanes and more about continuing to wrestle quietly with pervasive, everyday fears. I reminded myself of my word every time I was afraid to speak my truth, to disappoint someone, to sit with an uncomfortable situation, not to mention all the big things out in the world that scare me. I’ll try to write more about this later if I get time. The longer I do One Word, the more all the words I’ve chosen become part of me – the work continues. But I feel like I’ve made progress.
Unless I get a clear message otherwise in the next couple of weeks, I’ve chosen my word for 2019. It’s kind of a different turn for me, but it’s the right time for it both in my life circumstances and as an appropriate follow-up to Fearless. Stay tuned.
3. Did anyone close to you have a child?
Two of my good friends, Alanna and Myla.
4. Did anyone close to you die?
My long-time former boss, Janell, died on June 1 after a long battle with cancer. She was funny, kind, wise, and one of the most self-sacrificing and stubborn people I’ve ever met.
5. What countries did you visit?
No new countries or states.
6. What would you like to have in 2019 that you lacked this year?
True, lasting margin in my life. Consistent quality time with friends and loved ones. Also, physical therapy or something for all my leg pains and problems. I don’t think I can truly love running again until that’s dealt with.
7. What dates from 2018 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
May 5 – the day Taylor’s house offer was accepted, then we saw Incubus at Beale Street Music Fest. May 15 – Taylor’s and my dating anniversary. September 27 – the Kavanaugh hearings. November 6 – Midterm Election Day.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Successfully completing my first year in a new job and new industry, and managing all the changes that came with it.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Achieving very little personally. I barely managed to keep up with basic life demands. I did not write anything of note, complete any home improvement projects, take on any significant volunteer work, or really do anything impressive. However, that was largely because much of my time and energy is now taken by the relationship and the job opportunity that I spent years tap dancing to get. I definitely still have goals and dreams, but they feel less urgent at the moment.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I almost made it all year without getting sick sick, which was great! However, I got intense pressure headaches and vertigo every time I went off Allegra. I guess I’m on it for life now.
11. What was your best purchase?
My Pilates membership.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
I can’t top my now-standard answer, “all the moms and teachers.” Also my BIL Lance, who earned a second master’s degree while working full-time and being a dad.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
You know.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Outside of bills? Travel and clothes.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Penny Hardaway becoming the head coach of the Tigers; Taylor’s new house; being able to walk to football games and to church; our vacations to Miami and the Blue Ridge Mountains; studying and discussing the Enneagram; voting; having double dates with my siblings and their spouses; seeing Leslie Odom Jr. in person.
16. What song will always remind you of 2018?
The Middle, Zedd feat. Maren Morris. BABY! **clock sounds* *Target logo**
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) Thinner or fatter? c) Richer or poorer?
a) About the same. b) How about, a lot stronger? I actually thought about this question at various points in the year and felt bummed that I’d have to say fatter; I rarely weigh myself, but some clothes I’ve worn for ten years don’t fit anymore. However, at the start of 2018, I struggled to carry a box of cat litter. Now I can do 80 pounds on some weight machines, and confidently do a full Pilates workout on a red spring, and if that means going up a size, SCREW DIET CULTURE, SMASH THE PATRIARCHY!!! c) Richer.
18. What do you wish you’d done more?
Read; write; maintain some space in my head and heart.
19. What do you wish you’d done less?
Feel anxious and overwhelmed. Stand in strange yards/the street coaxing Rufus out from somewhere he shouldn’t be.
20. How did you spend Christmas?
I’ll spend it the same as last year: with my parents, and Taylor and his family. My siblings and nieces aren’t coming until after Christmas.
21. Did you fall in love in 2018?
More and more. This is the best relationship I’ve ever been in. ♥
22. What concerts did you attend this year?
I saw Hanson with the Nashville Symphony Orchestra, and Leslie Odom Jr. at a book signing/talk where he also sang a few songs. At Beale Street Music Fest, I saw Dashboard Confessional, Third Eye Blind, Alanis Morrissette, Vance Joy, Incubus, Flaming Lips, Misterwives, and Odesza.
23. What was your favorite TV program?
Still This Is Us, now followed by The Good Place.
24. What was the best gift you received?
For my birthday, Taylor gave me a framed photo he took of me on a mountain in Georgia, with FEARLESS written on the wrapping paper. ♥
25. What was the best book you read?
This was a weird reading year for me. Nothing truly, unequivocally blew me away. Off the cuff, I’ll give Best All-Around to Tara Westover’s Educated. 2018 reading wrap-up still to come.
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
No one immediately jumps to mind.
27. What did you want and get?
What I said I wanted in 2017: “More margin in my schedule. A better balance of cardio and strength training. Another ‘big’ trip – I stayed pretty close to home this year.” One out of three’s not bad? I also wanted and got to go to Miami with Taylor.
28. What did you want and not get?
A bathroom remodel (which probably won’t happen now).
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
A Star Is Born; Black Panther; I, Tonya; To All the Boys I’ve Loved Before on Netflix. For obvious plot reasons, I cannot say I loved Avengers: Infinity War, but wow it was A LOT.
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 39 (for the first time)!! I had to go to work, but my wonderful co-workers decorated my cube and brought in a homemade cake. My boss let me leave early, so I did a little shopping. Taylor gave me some thoughtful presents (see #24) and took me to dinner at Slider Inn for my traditional special-occasion Jameson slushie. The following weekend, he threw me a lovely party at his house.
31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Better time management.
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2018?
My comfort quotient is going up (but not in a “letting myself go” way). I’m embracing leggings with tunics and dresses. I’m investing in more supportive shoes. I publicly, officially swore off pants, only to find two styles that actually work for me.
33. What kept you sane?
Taylor, yoga, and cat purrs.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Between A Star is Born and her Netflix documentary, I gained new appreciation for Lady Gaga this year.
35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Everything. Every single, relentless day.
36. Whom did you miss?
Most of my longtime friends. ALL of us are busy, over-committed, and exhausted, and many are also now moms of small children and it’s like… see you after they graduate? I enjoy making new friends, but it’s not the same. Friends who have walked with you a while are an anchor, and I’ve felt a little adrift this year.
37. Who was the best new person you met?
My new co-paralegal, who joined us in October. She is sharp as a tack and I’d still want to know her even if we didn’t work together.
38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2018.
There’s a difference between quitting something because it’s hard, and quitting something because it’s actively hurting you.
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
When does it end, when do the knots loosen?
When is my mind caged inside free to go?
I’ve been focused on what I could lose and I’ve lost touch
Lost sight of you and what is my own.
It’s here, right here where I am
Right here and now
It’s here, I’m cutting the cord
Lifted away where this doubt can’t hold me down.
Give me the rope that is tied around your neck
I’ll cut it away, I’ll set you free as you should be
No longer must we live under these burdens
You’re my beloved, my kin, no more a slave.
I don’t need to worry about tomorrow
All the work I need is what’s at hand
I don’t need to worry about tomorrow
All the love I make is what will stand. – Joseph
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