The 2020 Survey

I’ve completed this survey every December since 2001. You can find past years’ posts in the Year End tag!

1. What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before?

Experienced a global pandemic; worked exclusively from home for most of the year; phone banked and canvassed for a political candidate; helped lead liturgy; quarantined; was pretty incapacitated for over a month; worked on a corporate acquisition; was pregnant twice in one year; attended church mostly online; maintained a pregnancy for longer than eight weeks; cooked a whole Thanksgiving dinner by myself.

2. What was your word for the year?

My One Word for 2020 was Peace. Ha ha!! My main takeaway was the importance of finding and maintaining peace within, because I’m sure not going to find it out in the world.

3. What new places did you visit?

I had been to Wyoming before, but only the flat southeast part. This summer we visited my brother and SIL in the Bighorn Mountains and it was wonderful. He also took me across the state line to cross Montana off my list! I feel like any new states added in 2020 are worth 3 states in another year.

4. What dates from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

February 29 – a happy Leap Day spent in New Orleans with friends. March 11 – the NBA shut down, and everything hit the fan pandemic-wise. I will never forget what I was doing that evening. March 17 – my last day working in the office. April 15 – found out my second pregnancy wasn’t viable. April 17 – I bought a new MacBook, and my MIL fell and broke her collarbone. (These events were not related.) September 6 – kayaked on the Spring River with friends, one of my best days of the year. October 2 – found out I was pregnant again! November 7 – the election was called. December 1 – my newest niece was born!

5. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 41. It was a Sunday. Taylor picked up my favorite Café Eclectic brunch to go, and I ate it while watching church. Then we went to a nearby nature preserve with my parents. In the evening, Taylor’s parents joined us in the backyard. We talked, opened presents, and ordered Slider Inn (I had my special-occasion Jameson slushie). It was a good day.

6. How will you spend Christmas?

At home with both sets of our parents, with precautions.

7. Did anyone close to you have a child in 2020?

My sister Debra had my newest niece! Also, two friends, Carol and Morgan, had baby boys.

8. Did anyone close to you die?

No, and I’ve never been so thankful to be able to say that.

9. What 2020 achievements are you most proud of?

Standing up for myself and my beliefs / having good boundaries in some painful situations. Starting and continuing weight training. Finishing my wedding thank-you notes by the anniversary deadline.

10. What do you wish you had done better?

I thought I would have a spotless, decluttered, perfectly organized home by the end of quarantine… and that was when we thought quarantine would last a month. Nine months later, any progress in that area has been made by Taylor, not me. I’ve barely kept up with daily maintenance or met my own cleaning standards. I’ve read all the things about not expecting too much of ourselves during an extended global trauma (especially when you have a brief pregnancy, a miscarriage, and then another pregnancy in the midst of said trauma). So I don’t beat myself up about it now, but I know I’ll grieve the wasted time someday when I’m back to spending most of my life out of the home.

11. What was the biggest challenge you faced?

Tuning out all the noise and listening for God’s voice (and my own).

12. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Only two things: pregnancy misery, and a strange, severe cold in mid-January that I later suspected might have been the rona (but I don’t have antibodies).

13. What was your best purchase?

My new computer. All my work-from-home pants.

14. Where did most of your money go?

Furniture/house stuff, medical bills, and Old Navy.

15. What were your best new discoveries?

The Starbucks Medicine Ball drink and its iced cousin, Green Tea Lemonade.

16. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Seeing my baby and hearing his heartbeat. Watching the owls in our neighborhood.

17. What song will always remind you of 2020?

Say So, Doja Cat

18. What concerts did you attend this year?

My mom, sister, and I saw Celine Dion in February. At least we went big before we went home!

19. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Julie and the Phantoms? :)

20. What were your favorite TV programs?

Nothing will top This Is Us for me as long as it’s on the air. My favorite streaming shows this year: Cheer, The Leftovers, The Plot Against America, Never Have I Ever.

21. What were your favorite films?

Little Women, and I bet Wonder Woman 1984 will join the list when I watch it on Christmas! Pandemic note: the last movie I saw in a theater was The Way Back, on March 6.

22. What was the best gift you received?

Ask again after Christmas?

23. What did you want and get?

Last year, I said I wanted “a long-term home (it’s happening!!). A new laptop, as mine currently runs like a desktop from 1998. Hopefully a child.” 2.5 out of 3! I also secretly wanted more time to be at home in peace. Sorry, everyone.

24. What did you want and not get?

Normalcy. Being able to hug my loved ones.

25. How would you describe your personal style in 2020?

Day pajamas and night pajamas.

26. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

We’re Dr. Fauci fans in this house. I was also frequently uplifted by Chrissy Tiegen and John Legend this year.

27. Who was the best new person you met?

Thanks to COVID, I had to think hard about whether I met anyone new this year. I’ve gone to church with my trainer and friend Kara for a while, but I remembered we didn’t actually start talking until February.

28. What were the best conversations you had?

With Taylor, my sister, and my mom.

29. What political issue stirred you the most?

Racism; I’ve done more reckoning with it this year, and I continue to learn and try to be a better ally. Related, the fact that 70 million Americans are still on board with, or at least willing to tolerate, white supremacy and basically every variety of hate and prejudice… and a lot of them are doing it in the name of the same Jesus I follow. It grieves and disturbs me in my soul.

30. How have your beliefs changed this year?

They’re mostly the same, but stronger. In particular, one of my core principles: I resist fundamentalism and extremism, no matter where it comes from. Not from someone I love, and not even from a side that I generally agree with.

31. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked this year?

The freedom to be close to people without worry, and to be out in the world. Also, a better yield from my garden/greenhouse. We were still figuring things out this year.

32. What behaviors do you want to change in 2021?

I hope to be more motivated and productive. I also expect to have a lot more work to do in terms of tuning out the noise. Nothing provokes unsolicited commentary/judgment like pregnancy and motherhood.

33. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Unexpected lunch dates with my sweetheart in the townships
Hardly even noticing these depressing surroundings
‘Cause there’s more time with his eyes that way, I’m lost in their affections
The warmest brown is eiderdown
It’s sacred ground to rest in

All that I love, rain at night
Shadows that fall in the backyard moonlight
Whatever it was we heard in the woods that we may never see
Who doesn’t love a mystery?

Pink fingerlings and Yukon Golds dug up and drying on the floor
Little frogs on the front lawn I didn’t kill in the mower
Phoebe back to build again above the basement door
Dry owl wings and other things I’m wildly grateful for. – Sarah Harmer