What I’m Into: January 2019

If January is any indication, 2019 will be an emotional roller coaster. It’s been a strange, happy, eventful, non-eventful, overwhelming month. Most of my energy has gone toward locking in the big pieces of our wedding and starting to process all the realities of getting married. People have responded in unexpected ways, as often happens at the hinge points of life. My work team is getting focused for the new year. Right at the beginning of the year, a friend from my supper club group, whom I was just really starting to get to know, died suddenly. There’s just a lot of intense stuff going on.

So, when possible, I haven’t been fighting my urge to go straight home after work and get straight into my pajamas. If you can’t do that in January, when can you? I’m embracing this season of quiet and stillness, of too much darkness and bright cold light with no leaves to block its way.

Wedding Update

As a refresher, Taylor and I got engaged on Christmas Day. All my siblings arrived in town on December 27 and insisted we go wedding dress shopping immediately. So I found and bought my dress on December 28. On December 30, Taylor and I toured a historic mansion and decided we didn’t need to look anywhere else!* We signed the paperwork a couple of weeks later, on the same day we met with the photographer. Taylor is being a true partner and bringing his needed business expertise to the planning process, but since January is his busiest month at work, we’ve had to make a lot of these decisions in fits and starts on weekends. Despite that, we have a date (June 29), a dress, an officiant (my BIL Lance), a venue, a photographer, a complete wedding party, and a wedding planner. Not bad for month 1. Five more to go!

* = My church sanctuary is beautiful, but we wanted to have the whole event in the same place, and I didn’t really want my reception in the little fellowship hall, where I also vote.

Reading

I kicked off my 2019 reading with A Practical Wedding, by the founder of the great website of the same name. My favorite part was about how most of the “timeless,” “must have or you’ll offend your grandma” traditions pushed by the wedding industry are actually <50 years old. I’m now finishing up Very Married, which I also recommend.

By some miracle, I scored the final Dark Artifices book at the library and spent an entire weekend reading it. 800-something pages is no joke, especially when I didn’t love it as much as the others. Love Saves the Day, a novel partly from the perspective of a cat, had been on my list forever. The last 50 pages made me cry more than a This Is Us episode. Meanwhile, now that my church small group from last “semester” is over, a few friends and I have restarted our book club! We were previously working through a short story book, but now we’re going to focus on long form books by diverse authors. Juliet Takes a Breath was the first selection.

Listening

I finally obtained the technology to listen to my phone, and therefore podcasts, in my 2013 car. It’s been a game changer. I’ve started The Dream (FASCINATING), semi-caught up on the Good Place podcast and Millenneagram, and am adding lots of new subscriptions.

Travel

My friend Esther moved to Korea almost four years ago, and last fall, she got married there! Over MLK weekend, she and her husband had an American reception in her hometown of Chattanooga. I broke up the trip by driving to my sister’s in Nashville on Friday night, going to Chattanooga the next morning, coming back to Nashville that night, then heading home Sunday. All the driving was worth it to see so many of my loved ones in a short time, including 5/8ths of the SIPsters. (PS, we realized that day that our group has two names each starting with A, B, E, and K, and have subsequently rebranded to BABEKAKEs. I love it.)

Since I had Monday off, I didn’t have to rush back to Memphis, so I could spend more time with family Sunday and also do some shopping in my sister’s neighborhood. On the way home, I stopped at the new Solar Farm Welcome Center. I just missed the sun setting over the solar panels, but got a full moonrise instead!

Around Town

For New Year’s Eve, Taylor and I and most of my siblings went to Mollie Fontaine’s. It was special to go out together, and I was thrilled to ring in the New Year with my family and my fiancé (!!) while wearing a Badgley Mischka. (It was my first Rent the Runway experience, and I’d definitely do it again!)

We haven’t seen these streamers much in January, since the Grizzlies are currently a blazing dumpster fire. We were happy to be present for both wins. There’s lots of drama happening with the team, which is well documented in local media if you want to look it up. The Tigers are doing better, but have had their down nights too. Tough times in Grind City.

Since I’ve felt so hermitlike this month, my only non-basketball outing was to Wes and Matt’s birthday party at Civil Axe. It’s like bowling… except with throwing axes. I hit the target a few times, but couldn’t get the axe to embed. The attendant asked me if I was afraid of the axe, to which I replied, “YES, yes I am, IT’S AN AXE.” The guys in the lane next to us were apparently in a league and were throwing their own shiny, sharp axes with great force. Clearly this place will only be open until there’s an incident, but in the meantime, it’s entertaining.

At Home

One of my camellias bloomed! Winter-blooming plants are such a miracle.

Eating

It’s been years since I’ve regularly kept real bread in my house. At Kroger, I saw that this (not cheap) Dave’s Killer Bread Organic 21 Grain was only 60 calories a slice and decided to splurge. IT IS DELICIOUS. I may never go back.

Wearing

Despite my general efforts to avoid obvious sweatshop fashion, I have two of this long-sleeved dress with pockets in heavy rotation. They’re comfortable, can be worn alone or with leggings, and are under $20 in some colors. I’m also all stocked up on Old Navy Pixie pants, the skinny work pant I thought only existed in my imagination.

Beauty

I spent the night at my parents’ house on Christmas Eve, and my mom had put some Tree Hut body wash in the guest bathroom. I’ve used their salt scrub for a while but didn’t know they made a body wash. Well, I had to get my own! It costs around $6 and is incredibly moisturizing.

I’m also loving the Colourpop Wet Palette, which I bought specifically for New Year’s Eve, but have been using on regular days too. You can do some less dramatic looks with it. Besides, I’ll have fun with sparkly blue eyeshadow any day of the week.

I upgraded my Tresemme heat spray to this Keratin Smooth version, and there’s a noticeable difference in quality.

Random Happiness

My Christmas present from Alanna was Signet Sealed’s Good News Calendar, “because good things have happened, and good things will happen again.”

When Taylor and I signed our paperwork at the wedding venue, the room we were in also held a wall of really old books. I was too awed to touch them, but I looked at them carefully.

I don’t remember how I found it, but I subscribed to the Girls’ Night In newsletter. It comes out on Fridays with lots of tips for restful fun and wellness!

On January 20, I wrapped myself in a blanket and watched the super wolf lunar eclipse from my balcony.

Wellness

I’ve been exercising in the morning before work for two months! In December, I had social plans almost every night and didn’t really feel the benefits of having my evenings free. But it’s started to feel worth it in January. I go to the gym at minimum three mornings a week – two for cardio, one for weights. One morning, I do yoga at home because I have Pilates later in the day. The fifth morning is a crapshoot depending on how sore and tired I am (usually very). I do think my body is burning calories more efficiently than when I was exercising at night, since I’m not gaining weight despite being ravenous all the time. Winter hibernation urges are so much fun.

On that note, despite societal expectations, I don’t plan to go on a drastic wedding diet. I already have a dress, and it fits. I’d love to lose about five pounds, but I won’t be devastated if it doesn’t happen. I have enough to do in the next five months without starving myself.

I started Yoga with Adriene’s annual 30-day January practice, Dedicate, but skipped a lot of days because I didn’t have the drive this year. Congrats to everyone who finished!

Your Monthly Rufus