This is a linkup with Emily Freeman that I’ve done for several years!
[ICYMI: The 2017 Survey // The 2017 Soundtrack // Best Books 2017 // Best Beauty 2017]
♥ I am employable. When you’ve had the same job since you were 21, and it took a while to find that one, and you’ve been passed over for promotions multiple times, it’s easy to feel like no one else would ever want to hire you (hello scarcity!). But in 2017, I had multiple proofs that that was not true (hello abundance!). In my few weeks at my new job, I have felt consistently empowered, validated, and capable. I’m in a completely new field and haven’t done anything major yet, but so far, my knowledge and experience translates. Every connection I make feels amazing. I’ve had a career impostor monkey on my back my entire adult life, and I cannot express how freeing it is to be rid of it.
♥ Feliway works! Rufus is affectionate and likes people, but he also has a little bit of a biting problem. Over the first half of the year, he got more and more aggressive until my arms and legs were so cut up I was afraid people were getting concerned about me. It was also affecting our relationship, as you might imagine. In desperation I shelled out for this pheromone plug-in and he calmed down almost immediately. Now I can tell by his behavior when it’s time for a replacement. BTW, I have a few theories about why he bites, one of them being the dog next door.
♥ Sometimes you have to choose growth and health over convenience. I gave up a short drive, a weekly at-home day, midday exercise, a co-pay health plan, abundant PTO, work I could do in my sleep, and a lot of flexibility to take this new job. I had a well-ironed-out (if also burned out) life, and now I barely know which end is up. I grieve the loss of those things here and there, but IT WAS WORTH IT. Every day I’m away from the old chaos, my mind is a little clearer and I feel a little more centered. I chose adventure in an environment where I can become my best self, and that’s what’s important. Everything else will work itself out over time. Repeat to self daily.
♥ On a related note, it takes a long time to recover from burnout. An excessively long time. By my estimation, I’ve been actively burned out for at least a year and probably longer. I’ve been professionally advised that it could take a year from this point to get up to “full strength.” So I’m in a constant battle not to give up on myself in those moments when I don’t know why I can’t handle life.
♥ I need to take more steps. My parents got me a Garmin Vivosmart HR for Christmas, and the last few days have been eye-opening. It started me at 7500 steps a day. On my first day, I got 2600. I have a lot of work to do.
♥ Lake Michigan looks like an ocean but smells like a lake, and that is very confusing.
♥ Editing a book is enjoyable but harder than I thought. I forgot to add this to my list of “things I’ve never done before,” but I edited my sister’s best friend’s novel. I figured I’d just read it and make some comments. I didn’t realize how many cylinders in my brain would be firing. I was analyzing grammar, punctuation, sentence structure, plot, scene structure, character development, etc. etc. etc. But the work felt really natural and satisfying to me, and Erin was pleased. So if you need someone to take a pass at your book, I’m available, but I’ll be charging accordingly. ;)
♥ Like pregnancies (so I’ve been told), no two half-marathon trainings are alike. Preparing for my first half in May 2016 was joyful and empowering. The second was tougher. The third, this month, was a straight-up slog. I’m not sure if I peaked at the beginning of my running career or what. I’m registered for a ramp-up race series that starts next month, so we’ll see how that goes.
♥ Do not have your checking account and savings account at two different banks. Just don’t.
♥ It’s okay to pursue joy now, because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. I know I’m not alone in the sense that America as we’ve known it is dancing closer to a precipice. Since last fall I have been gradually robbed of my faith that “it can’t happen here” (fill in the blank with whatever “it” is to you). I’m not rending my garments or doomsday prepping or anything, but I am very aware that our society already looks different than it did a year ago, and despite the best efforts of good people, it might continue to get worse. Anything could happen, slowly, or in one fell swoop. So I’m really appreciating my current bounty and privileges, and enjoying what makes me happy without feeling weird guilt about it.
♥ A total solar eclipse is worth going out of your way for. Taylor and I drove to Nashville to see the eclipse with my sister and her family. Memphis was getting 90-something percent totality and I honestly didn’t think it would be that different, but it seemed worthwhile to go under the circumstances. Well, the difference between a 99% and 100% eclipse is EVERYTHING. I will never forget the sudden darkness in my peripheral vision, feeling the air get cool around me, and the 360-degree sunset. Experiencing that changed me on some sort of cellular level. The next total solar eclipse in North America is in April 2024, and if it’s at all possible for you to get into the path, I cannot recommend it enough. I plan to be there!
What did you learn this year?
Add a Comment + Posted in: reflections, year end
I put an embarrassing quantity of my resources into researching and experimenting with beauty products, and it’s time for everyone to benefit! I get zero kickbacks from these recommendations or links. Just having fun!
EYES
NYX HD Professional Eyeshadow Base // Makeup Revolution New-trals vs. Neutrals Eyeshadow Palette // L’Oreal Colour Riche Shadow Quads in Haute Hazel // Maybelline The Falsies Push-Up Angel Waterproof Mascara // Cover Girl Perfect Point Plus Eyeliner
2017 was my year for learning about primer, and I lucked out on the first try with this NYX eye primer. Even after a long run at the end of the day, my eyeshadow still looks fresh. It’s pretty amazing.
Technically I started using the New-trals vs. Neutrals palette in 2016, but it remained my favorite this year, and that’s saying a lot given my MR palette haul in September! The reds and purples are on trend without being too much. I’ve also gotten compliments every time I’ve used this L’Oreal quad. Blue eyeshadow will always seem really 80s to me, so I feel fun and rebellious wearing it.
Best In Show: I tried MANY mascaras this year, including the revered Benefit They’re Real!, but none came close to this Maybelline mascara with the Victoria’s Secret name. It lifts, curls, and enhances. I think I’m ready to put a ring on it.
I’m very picky about eyeliner, and remain pleasantly surprised by Cover Girl’s Perfect Point Plus, which I have in green and burgundy. The only other brands that pass my muster are L’Oreal Colour Riche and Rimmel Exaggerate Smoke n’ Shine. All other chalky, clumpy, and goopy eyeliners are dead to me.
FACE
L’Oreal Infallible Pro-Matte 24 Hour Foundation // Real Techniques Concealer Brush // Oz Naturals Ultra Ageless Eye Creme // NYX Tinted Brow Mascara
As I frequently gripe, the struggle of being a grown woman with a 16-year-old complexion is REAL. In my experience, most skincare and beauty companies have no idea what true oily skin is. But Infallible Pro-Matte is a very decent effort, even better than Maybelline Fit Me Matte, which I was using before. With the Pro-Matte foundation and powder, I can stay shine-free for about four hours. Woo!!
I use mostly Real Techniques makeup brushes and am glad I picked up the concealer brush this year. I think you have to buy it individually, as I haven’t seen it packaged with any of the face brush sets.
Despite my oily skin, my undereye area is starting to need more serious attention. After trying a few meh options, I found this Oz Naturals cream in an Amazon search and have been really happy with it! I use this at night, and Garnier Moisture Rescue gel cream during the day.
This NYX brow mascara is the easiest brow product out there if you’ve used all your primping time on other stuff (i.e. me every day). I use Brunette (Chocolate was too light).
NAILS
Revlon Colorstay Gel Envy Longwear Nail Enamel in Hold ‘Em and Double Down // OPI Do You Sea What I Sea?
First of all, I couldn’t save a product photo, but CVS Beauty 360 Pro Strength Nail Polish Remover has CHANGED MY LIFE. I keep my nails painted 90% of the time, not for vanity, but because they split and break otherwise. I’m good at doing them myself, but when I feel an urge to go to the salon, it’s often largely so someone will remove old polish for me. I used to spend 10 minutes scrubbing it off. Then I discovered this stuff. Even glitter polish is no match for it. Best $5 ever spent.
This year I mostly wore Revlon Colorstay Gel Envy, which is cheap (especially at Target or Kroger), lasts a week or more, and comes in great colors. Here are two of my favorites. I also fell in love with this blue OPI shade on one of my occasional trips to Spa Nail.
ACCESSORIES
Babyliss Nano Titanium Portofino Dryer // Brush Cleaning Mat // Palette Organizer
After replacing the same Conair hair dryer for most of my 30s, I decided to upgrade to this Babyliss Portofino dryer. It has a five-year warranty, and I have been VERY happy with it! Don’t bother with the matching Babyliss finger diffuser – get the generic $5 diffuser from Sally Beauty or Amazon instead. I felt the Babyliss one made my hair too flat. (Oh, and speaking of Sally, I love their coconut-infused comb so much I bought a second one for travel.)
Cleaning my makeup brushes used to feel like an ordeal, so I rarely did it, which we all know is no good. This makeup brush cleaning mat is efficient and makes the process a strangely satisfying BREEZE. The vendor on Amazon keeps changing, but the mat is the same and should never run you more than $6. Again, well worth it.
My aforementioned palette spree made my eyeshadow drawer hard to navigate, so I splurged on this pretty organizer. I love having all the palettes where I can see them, and everything is getting used more often!
HELP ME GET EVEN MORE BEAUTIFUL IN 2018
I’m looking for tips and recommendations for the following:
♥ Eyeshadow crease brush. The Sonia Kashuk one I have isn’t really working.
♥ How on earth to use highlighter. I have a lovely Makeup Revolution highlighter palette that I occasionally take out, admire, and then put away with a shrug.
♥ Better eyeliner application. I’m pretty terrible at it.
♥ Oily skin products and/or curly hair products you’re using and loving!
♥ I enjoy makeup videos and tutorials, so share your favorites! (Bonus if they focus on affordable brands – point of reference, the only beauty vlogger I watch semi-regularly is ShanShortcake.)
2 Comments + Posted in: beauty, year end
Remember when I used to post in-depth monthly recaps of everything I read? And sometimes individual long reviews of ARCs I would get from Netgalley and BookLook Bloggers? Ha ha!! That’s too much for me these days, but I can handle a year-end book roundup. My reading time has become too precious to waste on books that aren’t enjoyable OR edifying to me, so I’m getting better at DNF-ing without guilt or shoulds. As a result, most of the following selections fall into obvious categories. I guess there are worse things than self-awareness about what your reading catnip is.
FICTION
The Swan Riders (Prisoners of Peace, #2) – Erin Bow
The Scorpion Rules was my Best Fiction of 2015, and this sequel did not disappoint! Describing the plot will spoil the first book, so I’ll just say these stories are so original and worth your time.
Lord of Shadows (The Dark Artifices, #2) – Cassandra Clare
The latest Shadowhunters novel is probably Cassandra Clare’s best work to date. Emma, Julian, and the rest of the Blackthorn family find themselves in a politically charged race to find a powerful spellbook before someone worse does. This book is so incredibly relevant that I’m amazed it wasn’t written this year.
American War – Omar El Akkad
It’s the 2070s. The East Coast is underwater, and the Second American Civil War rages on. Born in Louisiana, Sarat grows up in a refugee camp in the sovereign state of The Mag (Mississippi, Alabama, Georgia) after her father is killed. There, she becomes the protegee of a mysterious man and is molded into a patriot and assassin. I wouldn’t call this an enjoyable read, but I read it six months ago and it still haunts me regularly. If you can stomach it, I think it’s important. El Akkad is a decorated war journalist and has created a very believable scenario.
Magical Cats Mysteries by Sofie Kelly
On the other end of the spectrum, I have loved this cozy mystery series about a newly transplanted small-town librarian and her two cats who help her solve crimes using their special abilities. Kathleen and her friends, and of course the cats, are so real and lovable. Just suspend your disbelief and soak it up. I’m on the fifth book, Final Catcall, right now.
All Our Wrong Todays – Elan Mastai
“Every person you meet introduces the accident of that person to you. What can go right and what can go wrong. There is no intimacy without consequence.”
As sometimes happens, this became my Best Fiction of 2017 later upon reflection – I didn’t fully realize how good it was while I was reading it. Tom Barren lives in an alternate utopian 2016 that exists due to discovery of a clean, renewable energy source in his 1965. Full of ennui, he hijacks his father’s newly invented time machine and takes a trip with disastrous results. Now, in our 2016 that seems like a nightmare to him, he has a lot to figure out about family, love, purpose, and fixing his mistakes. This story will shake you up and make your head hurt at times, but it is SO, SO GOOD, and the “accident of a thing/person” concept referenced above is the truest thing I’ve read in a long time.
Sleeping Giants and Waking Gods (The Themis Files, #1 and #2) – Sylvain Neuvel
When Rose was a child, she fell through a hole in the ground behind her house and into a giant, glowing metal hand. Now she’s a grown-up physicist recruited by a nameless Keyser Soze figure to figure out what the hand is and discover its purpose. As Rose builds her team and puts the puzzle pieces together (sometimes literally), the big picture becomes less and less clear. These novels were my most purely enjoyable of the year. They’re smart, funny, suspenseful, and IMHO very visual in a way that would make them excellent movies. Love.
Maybe in Another Life – Taylor Jenkins Reid
I’m a sucker for a Sliding Doors concept, and this novel tells the parallel stories of 29-year-old Hannah after she returns to Los Angeles to live with her best friend. In one version, she goes home with her high school sweetheart after running into him at a bar, and in the other, she doesn’t. It’s interesting to see how different plot points translate across the stories.
Carve the Mark – Veronica Roth
In Veronica Roth’s follow-up to the Divergent series, two ethnic groups are fighting for control of the planet Thuvhe. Akos, a farmer’s son, is taken by the minority Shotet in a raid, and becomes a servant to the ruling Noavek family. Cyra Noavek is forced to use her “currentgift” of chronic pain against her dictator brother’s enemies. As she and Akos get to know each other and grow closer, a rebellion begins to take shape. I waited a while to pick up this book, but there’s a lot to dig into here, and I liked it.
NONFICTION
Essay Memoirs by Strong, Famous Women
Scrappy Little Nobody – Anna Kendrick
Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand In the Sun and Be Your Own Person – Shonda Rhimes
The Girl with the Lower Back Tattoo – Amy Schumer
This Is Just My Face: Try Not to Stare – Gabourey Sidibe
What can I say – this is my current favorite genre and I don’t see that changing anytime soon. People, especially creative people, are so interesting! None of these women were quite what I expected, and in fact, Anna Kendrick is the only one whose work I was really familiar with before reading her book. (I am of course aware of the Shondaland empire, but haven’t watched any of her shows, other than a few episodes of How to Get Away with Murder.)
Faith Evolution
Damaged Goods: New Perspectives on Christian Purity – Dianna Anderson
An examination of the long-term damage done by evangelical purity culture, and a proposal to build a new Christian sex ethic around consent and doing no harm to yourself or others. This book is controversial to many, but I appreciated the thought and care that went into it, and found it helpful.
Girl at the End of the World: My Escape from Fundamentalism in Search of Faith with a Future – Elizabeth Esther
“These men can just sit here on my shelf and argue with each other. I am done listening to their voices in my head. If I am going to find my way back to God, I will start from scratch. I will choose the way of the illiterate… I want to experience the God who inspired me as a child, the God who found me long before I could comprehend a single word in my Bible. I want to experience God pursuing me for once. I am tired of seeking, striving, and knock-knock-knocking on heaven’s door. I no longer want to know that silent, capricious, harsh God who would just as soon throw me into the fires of hell as save me. I am challenging God to pursue me like someone who has never been exposed to the Bible. Love me, God. I dare You.”
I think I would have named this memoir my Best Nonfiction of 2017 on the above passage alone. Thankfully, there’s a lot more where that came from. Esther pulls no punches in telling the story of her upbringing in a fundamentalist cult, how she and her husband got out, and the messy process of rebuilding their faith and life. While my background is a lot less extreme than hers, her words really resonated with me.
Small Victories: Spotting Improbable Moments of Grace – Anne Lamott
More funny, deep thoughts from St. Anne. I think this is my favorite of her recent books.
Other Stuff
Just My Type: A Book About Fonts – Simon Garfield
This is what it sounds like. I’ve always been kind of a font nerd and thought this was informative and entertaining.
Ask Polly’s Guide to Your Next Crisis – Heather Havrilesky
I’ve been an avid reader of New York Magazine’s The Cut all year, and Ask Polly’s advice columns are my favorite. Her writing is tender, wholehearted, and profound. This is the shorter of two collections that are out now.
American Band: Music, Dreams, and Coming of Age in the Heartland – Kristen Laine
A season with a national-championship high school marching band in Indiana, which, unbeknownst to the students, is their longtime director’s last. This book took me straight back to my marching days, and has such a tight narrative and high drama that it’s sometimes hard to believe it’s real (but that’s band life, right? :)). It had been on my TBR list for years, but I ended up reading it right before I met my boyfriend, who’s a drummer and has instructed BOA-bound drumlines for years.
Everything else I read this year:
Fiction
Sorrow’s Knot – Erin Bow
Maud – Melanie Fishbane
We Are the Ants – Shaun David Hutchinson
Love, Lucy – April Lindner
The Minor Adjustment Beauty Salon and The Handsome Man’s Deluxe Café (The No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency, #14 and #15) – Alexander McCall Smith
From a Distant Star – Karen McQuestion
Everything That Makes You – Moriah McStay
Summer Days and Summer Nights: Twelve Love Stories – Stephanie Perkins et al.
Steelheart (The Reckoners, #1) – Brandon Sanderson
Today Will Be Different – Maria Semple
Beast – Brie Spangler
Nonfiction
Nothing to Prove: Why We Can Stop Trying So Hard – Jennie Allen
You’ll Grow Out of It – Jessi Klein
May I Be Happy: A Memoir of Love, Yoga, and Changing My Mind – Cyndi Lee
Present Over Perfect: Leaving Behind Frantic for a Simpler, More Soulful Way of Living – Shauna Niequist
Congratulations, By the Way: Some Thoughts on Kindness – George Saunders
Let’s Talk About Love: A Journey to the End of Taste – Carl Wilson
Tables in the Wilderness: A Memoir of God Found, Lost, and Found Again – Preston Yancey
Final 2017 book count to date: 40, but I’m confident I’ll finish one or two more before New Year’s Eve. Although this is a low annual total for me, it’s actually not as bad as it’s felt. Either way, I’m aiming higher next year. I am also down to fundraise for a Memphis Library app with book availability and location info, preferably one that integrates with Goodreads. Let’s bring reading into this century!
Add a Comment + Posted in: book reviews, year end
I’ve completed this survey every year since 2001! This time, I’m incorporating my favorite pictures from the year. Most of them have been posted here previously at some point, but So What, Who Cares?
1. What did you do in 2017 that you’d never done before?
Saw a total solar eclipse; left my full-time job for a new one at a new company; attended a vow renewal (my parents’!); shopped at IKEA; marched and protested; contacted my representatives regularly; got a sister-in-law; participated in cat yoga, and was in a short film about it; almost got hit by a truck, and was on the news about it; went on a family vacation with someone I’d been dating for less than a month (a gamble, but I won); hosted Easter dinner; attended a gala; hired a regular house cleaning service; volunteered at legal clinics; joined a CSA; registered for the M-Town summer race series, and only missed one race; went moderately viral on Twitter; visited Chicago for real.
2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
My One Word for 2017 was Abundance. It felt like an audacious choice, and it was. But MAN DID IT DELIVER. Or I guess I should say God delivered. My word for 2018 came to me earlier than usual… more on that after the new year!
3. Did anyone close to you have a child?
This feels like a trick question, because I don’t think so?
4. Did anyone close to you die?
Thankfully, no.
5. What countries did you visit?
I stayed in the USA again, but new states: Oklahoma and Wisconsin! And my jaunt to Kenosha with my friend Becca and her husband was a BLAST. Four words: donut glazed chicken wings.
6. What would you like to have in 2018 that you lacked this year?
More margin in my schedule. A better balance of cardio and strength training. Another “big” trip – I stayed pretty close to home this year.
7. What dates from 2017 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
January 1: Not just New Year’s Day anymore – my brother got married! February 16: Emergency church member meeting where we got some bad news that would change our church forever. April 25: Taylor’s and my first in-person meeting. We had drinks at Slider Inn, one of my favorite hangouts. I realized after the fact that it was the perfect date. :) July 15: I saw Hamilton in Chicago with Becca! November 17: I gave notice at my job of 16 years. December 11: My first day at my new job!
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Protecting myself against further burnout: recognizing unhealthy and unsustainable situations, naming them, and doing something about it. Learning to endure the disapproval of a variety of authority figures for what I believe to be right and for the sake of my own health. Two huge accomplishments for a people-pleaser like me.
9. What was your biggest failure?
Always leaving something important undone. Over the last few years I’ve felt capable of less and less in my daily life; to quote a Twitter definition of adulthood, “overbooked and failing everyone all the time.” I keep waiting to bottom out and start getting “better,” but it still hasn’t happened. I struggle every day. On a related note, I’m constantly burdened that I’m not doing enough to help refugees, the homeless, etc.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I’m still healthy, other than some mild sinus problems and running injuries!
11. What was your best purchase?
Two boring but impactful items: my Shark Lift-Away vacuum and my three-compartment recycling bag. I was going to add a few beauty purchases, but I might indulge in a whole Brenda’s Best Beauty 2017 post!
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
My former boss, Janell, for functioning amazingly well with stage four cancer while marking her 50th (FIVE OH) anniversary at the company. My friend Katie from church for helping out and going to bat for me when I really needed it. Also, ALL THE MOMS AND TEACHERS. You have the hardest jobs in the world.
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
It’s 2017, so that’s a long list, but a few big ones: The leader of the free (?) world and his enablers. Gannett Media for systematically killing Memphis’s local newspaper. The host of my first (and last) Airbnb stay, who put me in an extremely shady situation.
14. Where did most of your money go?
Nothing really stands out, but I know I bought a lot of clothes and shoes. :\ And a quality purse, finally.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Seeing Hamilton. Witnessing a total solar eclipse with family and my boyfriend. Redoing my guest room/office and my own bedroom without spending too much. Seeing Hanson again with my sister and Bethany. Tiger football going 10-2. Take That For Data. Doing Yoga With Adriene WITH Adriene on her FWFG Roadshow. Baby hippos – I’m a big fan of both Fiona and our zoo’s Winnie!
Credit: Sharon Wilkerson
16. What song will always remind you of 2017?
Some years I struggle to answer, but 2017 is a no-brainer: Shape of You by Ed Sheeran. Which I can never take seriously again after watching this. Runner-up: Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
Happier; fatter (ugh); richer.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
Reading and writing – I’ve scaled way back on both, which isn’t good for me. Spending time with my friends. See also #9.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Mindlessly and excessively checking social media. I’m happier when I stick to my second 2017 guiding principle, “Never read the comments.”
20. How did you spend Christmas?
I’ll spend it here in Memphis with my parents, then with Taylor and his parents. (Note: I’ve been single for seven Christmases and am really enjoying this holiday season! ♥) My siblings and nieces are arriving later next week.
21. Did you fall in love in 2017?
Yes. :)
22. What concerts did you attend this year?
Garth Brooks; Ben Folds; Johnnyswim; Norah Jones; Journey; Hanson; James Taylor and Bonnie Raitt. At Beale Street Music Fest this year I saw The Strumbellas, Grouplove, Jill Scott, Dawes, Jimmy Eat World, Snoop Dogg, Kings of Leon, X Ambassadors, Death Cab for Cutie, Ani DiFranco, Ben Harper, and Soundgarden. Yep – I saw Chris Cornell for the first time two weeks before he died. Still a little stunned by that.
23. What was your favorite TV program?
This Is Us for the second year in a row!
CHANGING QUESTION 24 because it’s really negative and I’ve never liked it: 24. What was the best gift you received?
A few weeks after we started dating, Taylor bought me a set of Moscow Mule mugs. I’d offhandedly mentioned that I wanted some, and it was a great surprise!
25. What was the best book you read?
I think I’ll do a best books post too, but my instinctive #1 choices are All Our Wrong Todays by Elan Mastai (fiction) and Girl at the End of the World by Elizabeth Esther (non-fiction).
26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
As I mentioned in my 2017 Soundtrack post, I became a Kesha fan this year, which I definitely never expected.
27. What did you want and get?
Last year, my answer to “What did you want and NOT get?” was “Career progress. A longer-term relationship. A reliable, functioning vacuum cleaner.” I remain gratefully shocked that I GOT ALL THREE OF THOSE THINGS IN 2017 and so many others.
28. What did you want and not get?
Spiritual “progress,” even though I don’t even know anymore what that looks like. At this point, I’m letting a lot stuff lie dormant and not forcing it. I think I just need to rest longer before trying to bloom again faithwise.
29. What was your favorite film of this year?
Hidden Figures. I saw it twice! I also LOVED The Last Jedi, and enjoyed Lady Bird, and Kedi, a documentary about street cats in Istanbul.
30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 38. It was a Wednesday, so per my Wednesday routine at the time, I went to early-morning yoga and then worked from home. My mom and I had lunch at Casablanca. After work, Taylor took me to a nice dinner at the Majestic, followed by Belle Bistro for British Bingo.
31. What would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not living under a cloud of legitimate anxiety about the future of my country.
32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2017?
I continued to narrow down my preferences and make my wardrobe a little more simple, cohesive, and appropriate for my age. After several years of “casual attire” at my old job, my new job is in a more traditional office environment, so I’m still reassessing and filling in gaps.
33. What kept you sane?
My sister. Taylor. Yoga. Stephen Colbert.
34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I feel overwhelmed by this question, so I’ll just say Mindy Kaling – I’m excited for all her projects coming up next year (and congrats on her new baby girl!).
35. What political issue stirred you the most?
Keeping last year’s answer: I am unable to choose just one in a year when the world was an ongoing dumpster fire.
36. Who did you miss?
As always, my siblings and nieces, but my brother especially.
37. Who was the best new person you met?
Taylor. :) I also genuinely like all my new co-workers, which is nice!
Credit: Kevin Wilkerson
38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2017.
I’ve been learning this for most of my 30s, but I really settled into it this year: doing everything right and not making any mistakes is not the goal of life.
39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
We gon’ be alright, put that on my life
When I open my eyes, hope I see you shine
We’re planting our flag, they don’t understand
The world is up for grabs
I feel glorious, glorious
Got a chance to start again
I was born for this, born for this
It’s who I am, how could I forget?
I made it through the darkest part of the night
And now I see the sunrise
Now I feel glorious, glorious
I feel glorious, glorious. – Macklemore
2 Comments + Posted in: year end
Previous annual soundtracks: 2016 // 2015 // 2014 // 2013 // 2012 // 2011
My rules: no repeat artists (duets and feat.s don’t count) and the final product has to fit on a CD. As usual, I make no apologies or excuses for my musical taste. Listen here on Spotify!
1. Someone in the Crowd – Emma Stone, Callie Hernandez, Sonoya Mizuno, Jessica Rothe (from La La Land)
Someone in the crowd could be the one you need to know
The one to finally lift you off the ground
Someone in the crowd could take you where you wanna go
If you’re that someone ready to be found
I saw and loved La La Land right at the end of 2016, too late to include it in any of my year-end wrap-ups. Right away I latched on to this song to set my tone for 2017. (Spoiler alert: it worked.) I also like the prominent flute part.
2. Chained to the Rhythm – Katy Perry feat. Skip Marley
They stumblin’ and fumblin’ and we about to riot
They woke up, they woke up the lions
Although Katy Perry is my homegirl, I haven’t gotten into Witness and am mildly freaked by all its eye imagery. But I enjoy this song and associate it with the Women’s March, which was an amazing experience.
3. I Dare You – the xx
I’ve been a romantic for so long
All I’ve ever heard are love songs
If I’d gotten back on any dating sites last winter, this song would have been a good profile.
4. Million Reasons – Lady Gaga
I bow down to pray, I try to make the worst seem better
Lord, show me the way to cut through all this worn-out leather
I’ve got a hundred million reasons to walk away
But baby, I just need one good one to stay.
This year’s addition to my “Psalms of Brenda” playlist, and in my opinion, Gaga’s best work to date. It takes a lot of talent to write something so simple yet so multilayered. This song encompasses my feelings about the hard things in my life, and my faith, which has felt old and worn-out for a while. But I keep trying to cut through the leather.
5. Die Young – Sylvan Esso
It’s not like I chose, not like I tried
But now I gotta wait around and watch you burn so bright
Points for a well-written description of unexpected hope. Extra points for making it sound cool.
6. It Ain’t Me – Kygo feat. Selena Gomez
I’ll take with me the Polaroids and the memories
But you know I’m gonna leave behind the worst of us
A fun song that’s come to represent me moving forward from the carefree phase I was living for a while.
7. In Cold Blood – alt-J
This song means nothing to me lyrically, but musically, it is TRANSCENDENTLY EPIC. Classic alt-J. I mean, just try not to play the air keyboard while listening to this.
8. The Sky is a Neighborhood – Foo Fighters
Heart is a storybook, a star burned out
Something coming up ahead
Don’t look now
This is my favorite Foo outing in a while, but its presence here also references our local Foo Fighters concert that was promoted ad nauseam for most of 2017 and then got rescheduled. Now we’ll continue hearing about it until next May.
9. Caught in the Middle – Paramore
I can’t think of getting old, it only makes me want to die
And I can’t think of who I was, ’cause it just makes me want to cry
Most people know Paramore is my favorite band. I was so excited for After Laughter, I bought it on CD and iTunes. Honorable mentions to Hard Times, Pool, and 26, but I had to choose this track as the most representative of my year.
10. Green Light – Lorde
This is a great song for running. I also enjoyed its usage in the finale of New Girl, which I hadn’t watched in years but checked out to see how they potentially wrapped things up. (It was renewed for one more season, but I would have been happy with that ending.)
11. 24K Magic – Bruno Mars
My song of the summer, and one of Taylor’s favorites. He loves Bruno.
12. Sorry Not Sorry – Demi Lovato
Now I’m out here looking like revenge
Feeling like a ten, the best I’ve ever been
As I’ve gained confidence and the tide has started to turn in my life, this is my standard-issue burn to everything that stood and stands in my way. I recommend it.
13. This Way – Dilated Peoples
This time I’ve made up my mind
This time I’m back on my grind
I know there’s things in my life
That I’ma let go starting tonight
Another motivational song that got me through a lot of running.
14. Feel It Still – Portugal. The Man
My runner-up for the song I’ll most associate with this year, generally. The first few times I heard it start, I thought it was a cover or creative rework of Selena Gomez’s “Hands to Myself,” since the first line is the same. Also, Taylor accurately calls Portugal. The Man “every Midtowner’s automatic favorite band” based on the hipster name alone. :)
15. Everything Now – Arcade Fire
Every inch of sky’s got a star
Every inch of skin’s got a scar
I guess that you’ve got everything now
I originally included Creature Comforts on this playlist, but it’s pretty dark, so I went with this song instead. It also has the advantage of playing into my Year of Abundance (which I know I’ve neglected to write about all year).
16. Slow Hands – Niall Horan
Another favorite summer tune that just makes me happy.
17. Praying – Kesha
I am proud of who I am
No more monsters, I can breathe again
And you said that I was done
Well, you were wrong and now the best is yet to come
‘Cause I can make it on my own
And I don’t need you, I found a strength I’ve never known
Becoming a Kesha fan was my greatest musical surprise of 2017. There are few artists I actively dislike, but I could not STAND her back when she was brushing her teeth with Jack. This confident, warrior Kesha is something else. I still get goosebumps every time I listen to this song and I wish I could send it back to my 2010 self. Honorable mentions to Woman, which has been in heavy running rotation, and Learn to Let Go.
18. How Far I’ll Go – Auli’i Cravalho (from Moana)
If the wind in my sail on the sea stays behind me
One day I’ll know, if I go there’s just no telling how far I’ll go
I cannot tell the musical tale of my year without Moana. I started listening to the soundtrack heavily in April, on a mental-health week off from work. So many of the songs resonate in my soul and got me thinking deeply about identity and place (I expect nothing less from Lin-Manuel Miranda, one of the greatest creatives alive). I realized I’m confident and stable in who I am, and could declare myself and focus on getting off the islands that can no longer contain me.
19. I Was Born – Hanson
My heart is a weapon and my mind’s electric
I’ll shock the world when you least expect it
Everybody’s betting on the big guy
But don’t underestimate the sting of the butterfly
In September I went to my fourth Hanson show, and my sister’s first, despite her originally leading me to Hanson 20 years ago. It was fantastic. This song was their only new release this year. It’s given me joy and reminded me at key moments why I’m doing things.
20. Glorious – Macklemore feat. Skylar Grey
21. End of Time – Beyonce
These two closing songs are shouts of joy, which is how I want to wrap up 2017. For maybe the first time in my adult life, I’m making positive advancements in my career and am in a happy, stable relationship. I realize things could change at any time, but I feel hopeful, and am appreciating this moment for all it’s worth. I made it through the darkest part of the night, and now I see the sunrise.